


Snapshots

by divineaglaia (polyhymnia1)



Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-06
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-05 07:59:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 33,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5367458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polyhymnia1/pseuds/divineaglaia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A glimpse into the lives of Annalise and Eve as Annalise seeks to recover from the shooting at the Hapstall Mansion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Wound

10 hours of hard labor, yet she was still surrounded by boxes. Stacks and stacks of boxes covered nearly every inch of her small office space. It was amazing really, considering how little room she had. You’d think it would take three hours, tops, to move into such a tiny space. But even with the help of Frank and Bonnie, she wasn’t even halfway finished yet.

“You ready to head out?” Frank interrupted her thoughts, leaning through the doorway of her office.

“No, I’m going to get a little more done,” Annalise replied, pulling more documents out of a box on her desk. “You and Bonnie can go though.”

“Okay,” Frank said, but hesitated at the door. “You sure you don’t want me to stay?”

“Frank," she said, trying to hide her exasperation. "I’ll be fine.”

Ever since the incident at the Hapstall Estate everyone around her had become overbearing. Even her own subordinates.

Frank stepped through the doorway.

“I think I’ll just hang around for a bit. Maybe help you unpack some more.”

Annalise glared at him. 

“Frank, I swear, if you’re not gone by the time I finish putting away the contents of this box...”

She hadn't decided on what she would do so left the threat open-ended.

Frank stared at her, but didn’t make a move to leave. Annalise could tell he was trying to gauge the seriousness of her threat.

“Try me,” she said.

“Okay, okay.” Frank threw his hands up in defeat. “But if something – if you need anything, just call me.”

“I always do, don’t I?” Annalise said, turning her attention away from Frank and back to the box she was unpacking. 

She waited a few minutes, putting several papers away into their respective file cabinets before looking up to see if he was gone. She walked out into the reception area to check. No Bonnie. No Frank.

It suddenly dawned on her that it was the first time she’d been alone in weeks. She leaned back against the front door of the office to take in a full view of her new practice. It was small, but in a prime location: on the 15th floor of a waterfront office space in Manhattan. By Philadelphia standards, it was extremely cramped. But, in New York, for a small practice like hers, this was considered luxurious. 

It had a tiny bathroom, an equally small kitchenette, and two offices: the one she used and another she let Frank and Bonnie argue over. The largest room by far was the one she was in now: the reception area. The place was costing her a fortune – Sam's fortune, actually. But six feet under, she didn't think he would mind. It was the least he could do. Still, her deceased husband's money wouldn't last forever. She desperately needed new clients. New York clients. Would it be wrong to pray for a murder? A high-end one. Some wealthy heir gunning down his cheating wife.  
What she wouldn't give for a killer to walk through her door right now.

She went back into her office, picked up the box cutter on her desk and searched for her next target. One box in particular caught her eye. It was sitting on the floor beside her desk, unlabeled. She remembered packing it with tremendous care. And when the movers brought it in she'd hovered over them until they'd set it gently down in her office. She bent down, ignoring the pain in her stomach, and slit the tape open. The contents were all still there and from the looks of it still intact. Belvedere vodka. Just what she needed right now.

Suddenly a loud banging pierced the silence. Her eyes flew open, and for a moment she couldn't remember where she was. Had she just fallen asleep? She pushed herself up from her desk, but had to hold on to the edge to steady herself.

The pounding at the door continued. Her office wasn't even open for business yet. And even if it was, who the hell would be banging on her door like that? She walked to the front, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She peered through the door's textured glass, until she was able to make out a familiar figure on the other side. She smiled, as she unlocked and opened the door.

"Eve, what are you ---"

"What the hell, Annalise," Eve said, rushing toward her. Eve held her by the shoulders, her eyes scanning her from head to toe. "I thought something had happened to you. It's 3 o'clock in the morning. "

Annalise just stared, her groggy mind slow to process Eve's hurried words.

"I called you a dozen times." Eve continued. "Bonnie called you. Frank called you." 

Annalise glanced around the office, trying to remember where she'd put her phone in this mess. She didn't have a clue.

"I'm sorry. I must've fallen asleep." Annalise replied. 

Eve sighed and shook her head, clearly frustrated. These days, Eve was rarely upset with her for anything, so Annalise remained silent, unsure of how to respond. Eve took the moment of uncertainty to brush past her into the office, uninvited. 

Eve glanced around, surveying the place before pushing aside a few boxes and settling on the waiting room sofa.

Annalise had wanted to wait until she'd finished unpacking before inviting Eve to see the new space. Clearly it was too late for that. She watched Eve, waiting for her assessment. But Eve continued to look around, to look everywhere really, except at her.

"What's wrong," Annalise asked, joining Eve on the sofa. She winced at the sharp pain the movement triggered in her stomach, but was grateful Eve didn't see it. "I'm fine. I don't understand why you're so upset."

Eve turned to her, started to say something, but quickly looked away again.

"It's...nothing." 

"Tell me." Annalise insisted.

Annalise could see Eve struggle with a response, before shaking her head.

"No, it's really not that important. Let's just go home."

Annalise would normally press her until she got an answer, but right now she was just so tired. Too tired to wrench an answer out of Eve. It was a conversation that would just have to wait.

Eve barely said a word on the drive home. In fact, the only time she'd spoken after they'd left the office was to insist Annalise leave her own car behind and ride home with her. But now Annalise wondered why Eve had been so persistent. Annalise kept glancing at her from the passenger seat, hoping she'd at the very least acknowledge her presence, but the silence just dragged on. 

When they arrived at Eve's flat, Eve left the car in such a rush she left Annalise behind in the process. It was so out of character for her, Annalise didn't know whether to be more worried or upset. Annalise hurried to catch up, at the cost of a great deal of pain to her stomach. She cursed under her breath, and pressed down on her bandaged wound with her hand. After a few moments, she felt wetness and knew she was bleeding. She hoped it was just spotting, not a broken stitch.

Annalise followed Eve into her flat, glancing down to make sure the bleeding wasn't obvious. Thankfully, it wasn't too bad and her Navy blue dress was dark enough to mostly conceal it.

"Eve," Annalise called, struggling to hide the pain in her voice. "We both know you're angry with me. I forgot to call, I'm sorry. I don't know what else you want me to do here." 

Eve paused for a long moment, before turning to face her.

"Why would I be angry?" Eve said, her voice tight. "I don't have any real right to be angry, do I?”

“I don’t understand…” Annalise said. 

“I'm just what? A glorified roommate, right? You're not obligated to tell me where you are or how late you'll be out. " 

Annalise let out a deep sigh, slowly making her way to the couch and easing herself onto the cushions. The pain in her stomach was becoming unbearable at this point. But it was nothing compared to the dread she felt at having this conversation. She had known it would come up eventually; she just didn't think it would be so soon. 

"Eve, when you invited me to come here, you said there would be no strings attached."

"It's not -- I'm not --" Eve stumbled over her words. She roughly ran her hand through her hair before continuing. "I'm not trying to pressure you. I’m just trying to figure out what we are? What this is." She motioned between them.

"You said we were friends," Annalise replied. "Good friends, who enjoy each other's company."

"That was before. Now, we're living together."

"Well..." Annalise struggled for a response. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Eve. Not after all she'd done for her in the past few weeks. Past few months really, if you counted helping her ex-boyfriend beat a murder charge. But clearly she was hurting Eve, just by being here.

"Do you want me to leave?" Annalise asked.

"No," Eve answered quickly. "You don't have to do that. I just -- "

Eve stopped and studied her for a moment. Her eyes narrowed and Annalise could see she was focusing on the site of her wound. Annalise subtly tried to turn her body to hide it. 

"Are you bleeding?" Eve asked, approaching her. 

"It's nothing" Annalise said, holding up a hand to halt Eve's approach.

"My God, Annalise, why didn't you say anything?"

Annalise just shrugged. Eve had enough to worry about; she didn't want to add to her concerns. She'd done enough of that recently. 

Eve sat beside her and surveyed the rapidly growing dark stains on her dress.

"Did you break a stitch? We may have to go back to the doctor."

"No," Annalise said, standing so quickly she nearly cried out in pain. "I've spent enough time in hospitals. I'd be happy never to see one again."

"Fine," Eve relented. "For now. But at least let me check the bandage."

Annalise immediately panicked at the suggestion. Eve may have had intimate knowledge of her body, but the thought of Eve seeing her bloody gunshot wound made her cringe with self-consciousness.

"That's okay. I'll check it."

Annalise quickly brushed past Eve, but was stopped by a hand on her arm.

"Annalise, just let me help," Eve said. "Please."

"But it's -- it's rather gruesome."

Eve let out a hollow laugh, "You think I care about that? I'm more concerned that if I don't check it myself, you'll try to hide the pain and end up bleeding to death on my brand new carpet." 

Eve said it with levity, but Annalise saw the overwhelming concern in her eyes.

Minutes later, Annalise found herself standing in the bathroom with Eve.

"Do you know how to do this?" Annalise asked, fiddling with the medical kit in her hand.

"Yeah, I've done it before," Eve said, taking the kit.

Annalise stared at her questioningly.

"You're not the only one with secrets, you know," Eve responded, arching a brow.

Annalise started to ask her about the source of her apparent gunshot wound knowledge, but Eve abruptly turned her around so that her back was facing her.

"What are you doing?" Annalise asked.

"Well, I can't change the bandage while you're in the dress."

Annalise tensed but realized the truth of the statement. The dress would have to come off. She hadn't even thought about how utterly exposed she'd be until now. She cursed herself for never wearing pantsuits. Why was she so nervous anyway? It wasn't as if Eve hadn't already seen, touched, kissed every inch of her at some point in their lives. She'd just have to get over it for the moment. Besides, Eve was already unzipping her.

Eve turned her around and finished peeling off her dress, allowing it to fall in a heap to the floor. Annalise caught her eye for a moment but quickly looked away. 

"I'm going to take this off," Eve said, and gently began peeling back the bloody bandage. 

Annalise hissed in pain. Thee blood had dried somewhat causing the bandage to stick to the wound.

"I'm sorry," Eve said, still focused on pulling off the bandage. "Okay. Unclench. It’s over."

Thank God, was Annalise's first thought. It hurt, but the quicker this was over the sooner she could put some clothes back on. 

Eve wet a washcloth at the sink, pouring a small amount of soap on it.

"This is going to hurt. Especially if you pulled a stitch. I can't see right now because of..." she faltered. "Because of all the blood."

Annalise watched silently as Eve very gently began cleaning her wound. This woman was always taking care of her. Always fixing things. It was a stark role reversal for her. Typically, she was the one called upon to take care of people and their problems. Until this moment, she’d never felt so much like a burden.

Annalise was so caught up in her thoughts, it took her a moment to realize Eve was no longer cleaning her wound. She’d tossed the cloth and was now trailing her fingers lightly across the stitches. Annalise shifted uncomfortably. The actual bullet wound itself had been small. But the bullet had been pressed against a nerve, causing her immense pain. The surgeons cut her open to remove it, and in the process the scar had quadrupled in size.

“It’s hideous, I know,” Annalise said, stepping away from Eve’s touch. She reached for the bandage on the bathroom counter to cover the wound. But Eve rested a hand on her forearm and she stilled. 

“Look at me,” Eve urged.

But Annalise couldn’t look at her. How stupid of her to allow Eve to see her scar. What had she expected would happen? Of course, Eve was disgusted by it. She was disgusted by it herself. She wasn’t even sure if it would ever completely heal, or just stay there as a reminder of that horrible night.

“Annalise,” Eve said, gently cupping her chin and lifting her head until their eyes meet. “I find everything about you beautiful.”

Annalise tried to pull away, but Eve held her still.

“No, listen,” Eve insisted. “Your scar...how it looks…doesn’t bother me. It bothers me that you were hurt. I just…”

This time, it was Eve who looked away.

She inhaled deeply before continuing, “This could have turned out very differently.”

Annalise felt a terrible weight on her shoulders. She knew Eve had been upset about what happened; she just never knew to what extent. But the way Eve looked right now, Annalise could only remember one other time when she’d seen her that sad. And that had also been her fault. All she wanted to do now was comfort her.

“It could have. But it didn’t. In fact, you could say it’s what brought us together.”

Eve replied with a wry smile, “That’s a nice thought. Basically, it took you getting shot to finally move in with me. What do I have to do to get you to commit? Chop off a leg?”

Eve may have veiled the remark in humor, but Annalise knew the seriousness of it.

“I just need time,” Annalise said, almost pleading. “I want to be that person for you, I do. But my life is such a mess right now. It wouldn't be fair to drag you in it."

"I'm already here," Eve responded, raising her voice. She paused, taking a few calming breaths before continuing. “Listen, I don’t want to pressure you into anything you’re not ready for. But the more I’m around you, the more I want you. And the more I want you, the harder it is not to have you.”

Annalise started to respond, but Eve held up a hand to stop her.

“Don’t volunteer to move out again. You know I don’t want that.”

Annalise smiled slightly. “That’s not what I was going to say.”

Eve looked at her questioningly.

“This isn’t easy for me either. Every time I’m around you, I just want…” Annalise trailed off. She could feel herself moving closer to Eve, though she never intended to do so. Everything about Eve was addictive. Her scent. Her touch. Her kiss. Never had one person held so much pull over her.

Eve stepped in, filling the remaining space between them.

“We can’t do this,” Annalise said, more to convince herself than Eve. “Blur the lines like this. Especially with me living here.”

“I don’t care.” Eve said, gently wrapping her arms around her waist and pulling her closer.

Annalise stared up at her, her breathing growing heavy.

"It’s only going to make this living situation more difficult.” Annalise said. But with Eve pressed up against her, she could feel her resolve slipping away. 

Eve chuckled at her remark. “For me? ...or for you?”

Before Annalise could respond, Eve leaned down. Her lips lightly skimming over Annalise’s neck. Annalise closed her eyes at the contact. How long had it been since Eve had touched her like this? Annalise knew she should be stopping this, but Eve’s lips were so enticingly warm against her skin. Annalise heard herself moan and bit her lip to choke it back.

“Relax,” Eve mumbled into her neck. “Don’t think.”

But Annalise couldn’t help but think. Of how much she wanted this. How much she wanted her. And in this moment, she could have her. Fuck the consequences.

Annalise turned her head and captured Eve’s lips. The kiss was slow, soft and familiar. But Annalise wanted more. Her tongue swept over Eve's lips, parting them. She deepened the kiss, satisfying her desperate need to taste more of the woman in her arms.

For a moment, Annalise thought she was being too forward. But Eve was quick to match her, pushing her back against the cold tile of the bathroom wall.

Eve trailed her hands up her waist. The skin-on-skin contact suddenly made Annalise remember that she was practically naked except for her underwear while Eve was fully clothed. That would have to change. She tugged at Eve’s shirt, pulling it out of the waistband of her pants. Her fingers fumbled to undo the buttons but she was making slow progress. Eve realized her struggle and pulled back from the kiss to pull her shirt over her head.

Annalise felt the absence immediately. She quickly closed the space between them, sliding her arms around Eve and pulling her close to plant kisses across her now-exposed collarbone down to the fabric of her bra. That would have to go too. She reached behind Eve to undo the clasp, but Eve apparently had other ideas. 

Eve pushed her firmly back against the wall. Her mouth latching onto Annalise’s neck, nipping and sucking at the most tender spots. 

“Fuck,” Annalise muttered, clutching Eve tighter.

She felt Eve smile into her neck. “I plan to.”

Eve continued concentrating attention on her neck, but Annalise was growing more impatient, more eager.

“Eve, please, I need…”

Eve hummed an acknowledgement. Now she was the one reaching for Annalise’s bra clasp, deftly undoing it and allowing the garment to fall to the floor. Annalise laced her fingers through the softness of Eve’s hair, tugging her towards her breast. 

Eve, as compliant as ever, dragged her mouth down to the tip of Annalise’s breast, taking a nipple into her mouth and suckling hard. Annalise’s body jerked at the contact.

It was all Annalise could do to continue holding herself upright against the wall. And honestly, the effort was becoming an unwelcome distraction. So she allowed her legs to give way, sliding down until she was sitting on the cold, hard tile floor. Eve followed her down, her mouth never once breaking contact with her skin. 

Annalise immediately regretted this new position. Sitting was awkward and applied an uncomfortable pressure to her exposed wound, which up until now she’d completely forgotten about. Eve must have noticed her squirming to get comfortable, because she grabbed her thighs, pulling her down until she was lying back against the floor. 

Eve hovered over her, gliding her tongue across her breasts, lavishing attention on both before moving lower, licking a path down her stomach until she reached the waistband of her panties. Her last remaining piece of clothing. But that distinction didn’t last long. Eve pulled back to tug them off and toss them across the bathroom floor.

Annalise closed her eyes in anticipation of what she thought would be next. But Eve took her time, leaving warm, wet kisses on the inside of each thigh. Annalise cupped the back of Eve’s head, again trying to guide her to where she wanted her most. But this time, Eve was determined to set her own pace. She untangled Annalise’s fingers from her hair and continued to focus on her inner thighs, nipping at the tender skin then soothing it with her tongue.

Annalise groaned. She reached out to find something to hold onto but her hands just slipped and slid along the smooth floor. She didn’t know how much more of this she could take. She needed relief now and Eve seemed to be taking her time, savoring the moment. 

Eve either heard her thoughts or felt her frustration building because suddenly Annalise felt a tongue parting her folds. She jerked against Eve’s mouth. Eve responded by firmly holding down her thighs as she sucked and licked at her flesh.

“Oh God,” Annalise whimpered as Eve found her clit, wrapping her lips around it and drawing it into her mouth. Eve held it there, flicking it over and over again with her tongue. Suddenly, Eve slipped two her fingers inside of her, twisting and curling them. It was all Annalise needed to go over the edge. 

Annalise arched and cried out. Her fists clenched and her legs tightened around Eve. Eve continued to slowly pump her fingers in and out of her as she climaxed. Annalise was overwhelmed by the aftershocks of pleasure, hardly able to catch her breath. She lied limp on the floor, completely spent as Eve began to lap at her. When she finally did catch her breath and open her eyes, Eve was lying beside her, a wide grin on her face.

Annalise returned her smile. “That was…”

“A first,” Eve finished for her.

Annalise shot her a questioning look.

“We’ve done this in several weird places: a storage closet, that photo booth at the mall…but never on the bathroom floor.”

Annalise laughed at her assessment. “I’m sure that’s because it’s not the most hygienic place to have sex.”

“And that grungy photo booth was?” Eve challenged.

Eve had her on that one. Annalise just shook her head and chuckled. But the moment of levity was short-lived. Her face fell when she realized the gravity of what they’d just done.

Eve must have noticed because she said, “Don’t worry. This doesn’t have to mean anything.”

Annalise looked at her with a sad smile. “It does mean something. You’re not just sex for me, Eve. You have more of my heart than anyone.”

Eve smiled at the remark and cupped Annalise’s cheek, caressing it with a thumb.

Annalise didn’t want to disappoint this smiling, content woman in front of her, but she knew she couldn’t commit to any relationship. Not with her entire life upended. Not with her future so uncertain. 

“I wish I could go back and change so many things.”

“Don’t say that,” Eve replied. “Everything happens for a reason. You’re here with me now. That’s all that matters. I love you, Annalise. You know that. But I also understand you. I know you’re not in a position to choose anyone right now. I wish it were different. I know sometimes I can get pushy about it. But I do understand.”

Annalise returned Eve’s smile, unsure of what to say. It was just like Eve to ease her mind with only a few words. To so completely get her. 

“You’re the best person I know,” Annalise blurted. She felt the lameness of the remark, but it was what she was thinking. Eve’s smile widened.

“Are you ready?” Eve asked.

Annalise looked at her, puzzled.

“To get off this floor. It’s kind of uncomfortable.”

Annalise laughed. “Kind of? I think I threw my back out.”

Eve stood first and reached out to help Annalise to her feet.

Annalise struggled. The effort caused sharp pinpricks to shoot across her stomach. She groaned.

Eve’s eyes fell to her wound.

"Oh, shit." Eve said. "I completely forgot. I'm sorry. I guess I just got carried away."

Annalise let out a strangled laugh, her eyes tearing. "I think we both did."

Now that she wasn't in the throes of passion, she was hyper aware of her injury. It was even more painful exposed to the cold bathroom air.

Eve studied the wound. "Well, luckily I didn't break anything.”

Eve grabbed the antibiotic ointment out of the medical kit, squirted a little on her finger and gently brushed it across the wound. She moved quickly to apply a fresh bandage, lining it up and pressing it into place with great care. 

"That’s it," Eve said, packing the unused supplies back into the medical kit. "How does it feel?"

"Better." Annalise said. She placed a hand on Eve's arm and waited for Eve to look up at her. "Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me. I like taking care of you."

Annalise replied drily, “You only say that because you don't have to do it full time.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

“Maybe,” Annalise shrugged. “But it is true that I’m a total mess right now. Even you have to admit that.”

Eve shook her head dismissively then smiled mischievously. Her eyes scanned over Annalise’s still naked form, lingering in certain areas more than others.

“You seem pretty well put together to me,” Eve said.

Annalise reached down to pick up her dress from the floor. She didn't want to put that same dress back on, but Eve's gaze was making her squirm.

“No, Annalise,” Eve reached out to stop her hand. “Don’t. I’m just teasing you. That dress is stained with blood, you can’t wear it.”

“Fine,” Annalise threw hands up in defeat. Instead of her dress, she grabbed her panties and bra from the floor and swiftly put them back on. She looked to find Eve standing there, still grinning.

“It’s late. Let’s go to bed,” Annalise said, still somewhat flustered. 

Eve nodded in agreement. They walked out of the bathroom together, neither saying anything. Annalise kept glancing at Eve, disappointed that she was still practically fully dressed minus her top. Once Annalise reached the door to her bedroom she turned back to find Eve turning the knob of her own bedroom door.

“What are you doing?” Annalise called out.

Eve stopped and looked up, her face puzzled.

“You didn’t think that was it, did you?” Annalise said with a playful grin.

Realization slowly dawned on Eve’s face.

“I thought you said you were tired,” Eve responded.

“No, I said it was late. Meaning it’ll be morning soon, so we don’t have much time.”

Eve stood frozen at the door, a smile spreading across her features.

“Are you coming or not?” Annalise asked. She entered her bedroom, Eve on her heels.


	2. The Date

Annalise pulled out her iPhone and opened up the notes app.  She glanced back and forth between her checklist and the items in her basket to make sure she had everything.  The meal she was making was so complicated she’d actually had to make several stops: one to the fish market, another to a specialty French store, and now she was checking off the last of her items at a run-of-the-mill grocery.  Southern food, she could whip up easily, no recipe needed.  But for this creation she’d had to contact old friends, research new recipes, and pray to the food gods that she didn’t screw up the whole thing. 

There had been only one other occasion where she’d cooked a French meal: for Eve’s birthday their second year together.  It wasn’t disastrous, but it wasn’t all that good either. Eve gobbled up every dish as if it was the best meal she’d ever had, but by then Annalise knew her well enough to know she was just being kind.  Annalise had spent the rest of the week making familiar home-cooked meals, everything from neck bones, collard greens and cornbread to stewed beef and rice, just to regain her reputation as a cook in Eve’s eyes. 

The meal she was planning to make now had nothing to do with redeeming herself.  Well, almost nothing.  Mostly, it was a thank you.  Eve’s support for her had been unwavering.  Eve had practically given her the chance to start a new life and hadn’t asked for anything in return.  The least she could do was cook a meal featuring her favorite cuisine, even if it was a rather risky pursuit to make French food for a connoisseur of all things French.  Oh well.  Annalise just hoped the second attempt turned out better than the first. 

Annalise rushed home after collecting everything she needed.  She wanted to have the meal ready before Eve returned home from work, which would be happening just a few hours from now.  She had actually taken the day off herself just to prepare.  Bonnie was taking care of everything at the office.  Not that there was very much to take care of.  A few clients from Philadelphia had kept her on retainer.  But not very many people were showing up at her door in New York.  Apparently, getting shot and nearly killed didn’t recommend you for service.

Annalise wiped the sweat from her brow after putting the finishing touches on what she could only describe as a masterpiece.  She’d done a few taste tests as she cooked and, at least to her palate, this could match the quality of any five-star French restaurant.  She glanced over the meal once more, hoping Eve would think the same.  She decided to leave everything in their respective pots for now.  She wanted to make sure it was as fresh and warm as possible when Eve arrived.  Besides, she had another pressing matter to attend to. She was sure she looked a mess after spending so many hours on her feet in a hot kitchen. 

Annalise showered quickly, but dressed with painstaking care.  It was just under an hour before Eve usually came home.  She didn’t want to get behind; she still needed to set the plates, but she also didn’t want to look like she’d been cooking all day.  More than that though, she wanted to look nice. While out shopping for the food, she’d stopped by Neiman Marcus to buy a brand new dress.  It was a bit more risqué than what she usually wore: a deeply plunging, crimson-colored V-neck. It was also an outlandish and unnecessary expense.  And now she wondered why she’d even gone through so much trouble.  This wasn’t supposed to be about her at all.  It was supposed to be about the meal.  About thanking Eve.  But even now she was sitting at her vanity, putting on makeup with an effort she usually reserved for nights out.  She couldn’t remember the last time she was this focused on making sure she was well put together.

The entire process took longer than she’d expected, and just moments after she’d finally managed to set the table, everything in its proper place, she heard the door open.  She breathed a sigh of relief.  Finished, just in the nick of time.

Annalise stood at the table, as Eve walked into the dining room.

Eve came in smiling, but stopped short once she got a full view of Annalise.  Eve’s gaze was so focused on her, Annalise didn’t think she’d even noticed the meal set out on the table yet.

“You look nice,” Eve said walking up to her.  There was an awkward moment where Eve seemed to want to pull her in for a hug, but stopped herself.

Annalise smiled and looked down at her hands.

“So what do you think?”  Annalise gestured toward the dining room table.

Eve turned, taking in the spread of food for the first time.

 “Wow,” Eve said, her eyes widening.  “What’s all this?”

Annalise had, of course, rehearsed this part and pointed to each dish as she referenced it.  “Well, to start we have moules marinières. Then, for le plat principal,confit de canard, pommes de terre  _sarladaises_ and asparagus.  And for dessert, New Orleans bread pudding with bourbon sauce.  I remembered how much you liked it when we went there for Mardi Gras.”

Eve turned back to her.  “You cooked?”

“It hasn’t been that long since I cooked, Eve. I do remember how to do it.” Annalise replied playfully.

Eve stared at her for a long moment.  “I know you know how to cook.  I love your cooking.  But…is this for me?”

Annalise nodded.  “I just wanted to say thank you, for everything that…just for everything.”  This part she hadn’t rehearsed.

Eve gave her a small smile.  “I’ve never seen you at a loss for words before.”

Annalise stared down at the watch on her wrist, aimlessly fiddling with it.

Eve continued. “Annalise, you don’t have to thank me.  I haven’t done anything except give you a place to stay.  And considering what happened to you, I don’t think that’s very much.”

“No, you’ve done more than that,” Annalise replied. 

There was a long silence, before Eve finally cleared her throat.

“This looks really great, Annalise.  But I wish you’d told me you were doing this.  I wouldn’t have made plans.”

Annalise looked up at her, surprised. Eve quickly shifted her gaze. 

Annalise thought back; Eve had never said anything about going out tonight.  They usually had dinner together every night.  Takeout, but dinner nonetheless.

“I didn’t know,” Annalise replied. “You never mentioned it.”

Eve sighed. “I think it’s been established that we don’t really have to check in with each other.”

“So where are you going?” Annalise asked.

“Nowhere. I—“ Eve faltered.  “Just meeting a friend.

Annalise studied her for a moment.  Eve was completely avoiding eye contact and fidgeting with her hands.  Annalise had known Eve long enough to know her guilty habits.

“Who is she?” Annalise asked.

“Annalise,” Eve responded, a warning in her voice.

“I just think it’s strange that you wouldn’t mention you were going out tonight.  And now, you’re being evasive when I ask questions.”

“You never told me you were cooking.” Eve replied.

“And you never told me about your date.”

“You said yourself we don’t have to check in with each other.”

“So it is a date, then,” Annalise said.  She was satisfied at having tricked Eve into implicitly answering the question, but felt no relief at the victory. Her chest tightened; an overwhelming sense of disappointment clogging her thoughts.

Eve sighed.  “Yes, it’s a date.”

Annalise couldn’t find her voice so just nodded.  She slowly turned away, walking into the living room. Her legs felt like lead.

 “Annalise,” Eve called, following her. “You don’t get to be mad about this.  This was your call.”

Annalise turned to face her.

“I’m not mad,” Annalise said in what she felt was a convincing tone. 

Eve huffed.  “That’s obviously not true.  So are we going to talk about it or just pretend everything’s fine.”

Eve waited for an answer.  Annalise just stared at her.

“Of course,” Eve said. “How silly of me to think we could actually have an adult conversation about it.”

“Don’t be patronizing,” Annalise replied.  Maybe, she was upset.  But she sure as hell didn’t want to talk about it.  Talking hardly ever made her feel any better. But here was Eve again. _Let’s talk about this problem.  Let’s talk about that problem._   As if it would make any difference.  To talk, you first had to have a firm grasp on what you were feeling.  And Annalise didn’t even have that at the moment.  All she felt right now was tired.  Tired of talking.  Tired of disappointment.  Just tired of everything.

“I’m sorry,” Eve said.  “I wasn’t trying to be flippant.  I just wish you wouldn’t shut me out.  I never know what you’re thinking.”

What Annalise was thinking was why hadn’t Eve told her before tonight that she had a date?    Did she think she could sneak out unnoticed? It was true that they weren’t a couple, so Eve wasn’t required to run anything by her.  But Annalise just felt it was common courtesy to tell the person you live with, the person you’re fucking every night, that you plan to go out with another woman. 

“I’m not mad about your date,” Annalise said, trying to conceal the tightness in her voice.  “I just wish I had known.  I would’ve cooked another day.”

Eve looked at her as if she was trying to find a chink in her armor, a flaw in her story.  But Annalise was a master at this, deception came easy for her.  But it had been awhile since she’d used it on Eve.

“I’m not blaming you,” Annalise said.  “I should’ve checked.  But I wanted it to be a surprise.  I’m sure we can just save most of it and have it tomorrow, maybe.”

Eve seemed to deflate a bit at this explanation.  But she nodded in acceptance.

“I would like that.”

They both stood in silence for an uncomfortable moment.  Eve stared at the floor, seeming almost sad.  . It dawned on Annalise that Eve may have wanted her to be upset about the date.  Her anger could be interpreted as jealousy.  And if she was jealous, it would mean she cared.  Annalise didn’t think she was jealous.  She wasn’t sure if she was upset about Eve’s date or just that Eve hadn’t told her about it.  And honestly, she was hesitant to dwell on the thought too long.

 It was Eve who finally broke the silence. 

“I have to leave in a little while. I should probably go get dressed.”

Annalise smiled as best she could.  “Of course.  Don’t let me hold you up.”

Annalise waited until the sound of Eve’s footsteps trailed off and she heard a door close.  She finished cleaning up the kitchen then sat down at the table in front of her own plate of now-cold duck, potatoes and asparagus.  An hour ago she was proud of her meal. Now it made her stomach turn. She packed the untouched food away into Tupperware and stored it in the refrigerator.   She doubted it would keep well, but it was either that or throw out all her hard work.

Annalise didn’t want to have to see Eve again before she left for her date so headed to her room and shut the door.  She lay in bed face down in her pillow, just thinking.  In Philadelphia, Eve had said she was dating other women. But Annalise had been living here in New York with her for weeks and in all that time Eve had never mentioned another woman, or that she was still even dating.  Who was this woman anyway?  Someone new in Eve’s life?  An old flame?  Her mind kept wandering to whether Eve would allow this woman to touch her, to kiss her.  The thought scared her.  But why should it?  Eve was allowed to do whatever she wanted. 

Annalise had only moved here to New York on the condition that there be no strings attached.  She never should’ve slept with Eve.  That was her mistake right there.  It made an already complicated arrangement even more complex.  She knew Eve had wanted more from their relationship.  Whether she still did was in question.  But it didn’t matter either way.  Annalise could not commit to anyone right now.  Hell, technically, she was still in her mourning period.  She was only widowed a few short months ago.

Annalise got out of bed, grabbed a nightgown out of her dresser, and headed to the bathroom.  She went through her nightly routine: removing her wig, cleaning off her makeup, wrapping a scarf around her head, and brushing her teeth.  She undressed and stared in the mirror at the scar from the gunshot wound on her stomach.  It had healed substantially in the last few weeks.  It was barely even noticeable anymore.  But looking at it reminded her that she still had Vicodin left over in the medicine cabinet.  What would it hurt to take one?  She thought she may have a little lingering pain in her stomach.  And besides, she needed to sleep and her mind was a tangled mess of thoughts, none of them pleasant.  She grabbed a couple of pills and washed them down with a small glass of vodka.

As she lay back in bed, she could feel herself relaxing.  All the strain and tension of the day slowly loosening its grip. Her mind, finally, for once, completely at ease.

The next morning or afternoon, she wasn’t sure, Annalise woke up groggy, light streaming into her room from the window.  What time was it?  She rubbed her eyes, forcing them open.  She looked over at her alarm clock. 12:03 p.m. She quickly did the math.  That meant she’d slept for what…more than 12 hours?  Was that even humanly possible?  She rolled out of bed, took a quick shower and changed into her Saturday wear:  a casual, long-sleeved, forest green dress.

She trudged into the kitchen, lethargic even after 12 hours of sleep.  She opened the fridge, stomach growling.  She wondered if she should reheat the food from last night but decided against it.  She’d wait for Eve.  Where was Eve anyway?  Finally, she settled on making herself a quick sandwich.  She was done cooking for the time being.

Annalise was halfway through her meal, when she heard the front door open.  Eve walked in, glistening with sweat in her running gear.  It took Eve a moment before she noticed Annalise sitting at the bar. 

“How was your date?” Annalise asked, after Eve pulled out her earbuds.

Eve walked over and took a seat beside her at the bar.  

“Are you feeling okay?” Eve asked.  “I tried waking you up this morning so we could go out for breakfast.  But you were knocked out cold.”

 “I’m fine. Just tired.  How was your date?”

 “Maybe we should go visit the doctor.  See what he has to say?”

Eve pressed a hand to Annalise’s forehead, gauging the temperature.  Annalise pushed it away, more forcefully than she’d intended. She just couldn’t take Eve being nice to her right now.

“I don’t need to a doctor, I just –“ She cut herself off.  For some reason, she didn’t want to reveal that she’d taken those pain pills.  But why should she feel guilty about that?  She was in pain, wasn’t she? They were prescribed to her.

“I just took something to help me sleep.”

Eve nodded, watching her carefully. “I think we should talk about last night.”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to do, but you keep avoiding the question.  How was your date?”

“No, not—“ Eve shook her head in frustration. “I mean what happened with us last night.”

“Nothing happened with us,” Annalise said, picking at the remainder of her sandwich.

“So you’re still maintaining that you weren’t upset?”

“I’m not ‘maintaining’ anything,” Annalise replied, defensively.  “This isn’t a cross-examination, Eve. I’m not upset now nor was I ever upset.  Why are you pushing the issue?”

Eve opened her mouth to respond, but hesitated.  Annalise knew the reference to a cross-examination would fluster her.  That Eve’s thoughts would immediately flashback to when she so harshly grilled her on the witness stand. 

Eve managed to recover quickly.  “Why do you do this?”

Annalise sighed; she knew where this was headed.

“If you’re mad, then be mad.  But don’t pretend you’re not upset with me and just shut me out.”

Annalise rubbed furiously at her brow.  Eve was right.  She was upset.  She’d admitted as much to herself last night.  But it was her own business what she was feeling. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

 “Do you ever?” Eve replied. 

Annalise knew the remark was more of a comment on her character than an actual question.

 “I don’t know what you want me to say,” Annalise responded. 

“I just want you to talk to me like a normal person.  I don’t want to have to always pull answers out of you.  I know you’re mad that I went out on a date. Just admit it.”

Annalise could feel herself glaring at Eve. “If you already know the answer, why even ask?”

Annalise stood up and tossed the rest of her half-eaten sandwich in the trash. Here was Eve ruining one of her meals again with her goddamn persistence.  All she wanted to do right now was put some distance between them.  But Eve followed her as she headed into her room.

“You don’t get to be mad at me for going out on a date, Annalise. “

“You’re right, I don’t,” Annalise said, pulling her suitcase out of the closet and plopping it down on her bed. She unzipped it and began dumping the contents of her dresser inside. She could feel Eve’s eyes on her back.

“What are you doing?” Eve asked.

“Packing,” Annalise responded, focused on the task.

“Why?”

Annalise threw her hands up in frustration and turned to face Eve.

“Because this clearly isn’t working.  Yes, you’re right, I’m bothered by the fact that you went out on a date. But you can’t keep pressing me to tell you things like that.  I don’t want to talk about it because I know I have no right to be upset.”

 “So now you’re going to move out? Because you didn’t like the questions I asked?  That’s a bit drastic don’t you think?”

“That’s not why I’m doing this,” Annalise replied, sitting down on her bed and staring at the floor.  She hadn’t even decided to move out until she went to grab the suitcase.  There was no plan. She’d have to stay in a hotel for the night until she figured out a more permanent solution.   All she knew right now was that she felt absolutely drained, and this situation with Eve was part of the reason for that.

Annalise said, “I don’t know what I thought would happen. Maybe, I thought you’d wait for me…until I was ready.  But I can’t expect you to do that.  And you can’t expect me to sit here and watch you date other people.”

Annalise turned back to her suitcase and continued shoving clothes inside. The room was silent, although Annalise could sense Eve was still there.  She never wanted to hurt Eve.  It was breaking her heart to do this.  But what else was she supposed to do?  Just sit here night after night while Eve did God knows what with God knows who?

“Annalise,” Eve called but she didn’t turn around.  If Eve gave her that wide-eyed, pleading look, she knew her resolve would just crumble.

“Annalise,” Eve repeated; now she was just behind her.  Annalise ignored her again, hoping she’d just go away.  Instead, Eve caught her arm and turned her around.

Eve held both of her arms firmly, preventing her from pulling away.  Annalise kept her eyes trained on the floor.

Eve began slowly, “If you don’t want me to date other people, then I’m okay with that for now.”

“I can’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not.  It’s my decision.”

Annalise shook her head.  “See, this is why I didn’t want to say anything.  Because this is what you do.  You make these grand sacrifices just to please other people – to please _me._   It’s not fair.  And I won’t let you do it.”

 “So what? Are you going to force me to go out on dates now?  It’s my choice, Annalise.”

Annalise released the breath she’d been holding.  “I hate what this arrangement is doing to us.  We never used to argue.”

Eve smiled slightly. “Well, technically we’re not arguing now.  You don’t speak enough for this to constitute an argument.”

“You know what I mean,” Annalise said.

“I do,” Eve said, dropping her grasp on Annalise’s arms.  “And it’s my fault not yours.  I told you I wasn’t going to push you and I’m trying not to, but sometimes I slip.  Having you here, but still not having you in the way that matters most is turning me into crazy person.  Someone who’s constantly badgering you for answers you don’t want to give.  Someone who makes up fake dates just to get a reaction from you.”

Annalise’s head jerked up at Eve’s last remark.  “What do you mean fake date?”

Eve turned and walked towards the window, staring outside.

“I didn’t have a date last night; I made it up.”

Annalise paused for a long moment, processing Eve’s admission.  She’d made the whole thing up.  This entire argument –or dispute, spat, whatever you wanted to call it – was over a complete fabrication.

“Why would you do that?” Annalise asked.

“I just wanted to know how you feel.  You never tell me.  You just keep thanking me for the things I do.  But I don’t want your thanks.  I want _you.”_

Eve was saying this, still facing the window, and Annalise could see her shoulders tense.

Eve continued, “I hoped that telling you I was going on a date would spark some kind of reaction so I could better gauge how you felt.  After you seemed so cavalier about it last night, I thought you didn’t care.  But then, looking back on it this morning, I realized your reaction actually meant that you did care and you were trying to hide it. “

“How?” Annalise asked curious.  She thought she’d put on an Emmy-winning performance.

“First, you hate to cook. I remember I would have to beg you to make me that egg scramble you used to cook for breakfast. You’d do it but only after…well, you know.”

Annalise did know. She smiled at the memory. Sexual favors for a fully loaded egg scramble, pancakes, and breakfast potatoes.

Eve said, “Plus, you’re always telling me food is never as good reheated as it is freshly served.  I put two and two together and realized, no way would you ever be that nonchalant about having to put a dinner of that magnitude on hold.  Even if you weren’t mad about the date itself, you’d at least be upset about delaying dinner, especially after all the work you put in. Once, I realized that, I knew you were pretending.”

Annalise was torn between appreciation at Eve’s brilliant deductive reasoning skills and indignation at having been deceived.

“I can’t believe you did that after I cooked all that food.”

“Well, I was hoping that would be an incentive for you to ask me to stay.”

A thought dawned on Annalise. “So where did you go then?  Last night?”

“Some bar down the street. I wasn’t there for long.  These guys kept hitting on me.  By the time I got back here you were already sleep.”

“I can’t believe you of all people made up a fake date.”

Eve laughed.  “Don’t get the wrong impression.  I could easily get a real date.  I just don’t want one.  I thought things between us would end differently last night. You’d be a little upset, you’d ask me to stay, I’d agree.  We’d have that absolutely divine meal you made and then fall into bed.”

Annalise smiled.  “That last part would’ve been nice. “

There was a long moment where neither of them said anything.  For her part, Annalise was at a lost for words.  She’d always known Eve could be just as, if not more cunning than she was but couldn’t recall ever being on the receiving end of her deception.  But it served her right, didn’t it?  How long had she deceived Eve?  She’d spent months pretending to go to her therapist to talk when really she was paying an exorbitant hourly rate just for Sam to fuck her in the privacy of his office.

Annalise was so distracted by her thoughts, she didn’t notice Eve move away from the window.  Eve was now standing in front of her, an arm’s length away.

“Listen,” Eve said, waiting until she had Annalise’s full attention. “I shouldn’t have done that you.  I’m sorry.  I can’t force you to be in love with me.  I didn’t realize it until now, but that’s pretty much what I’ve been trying to do.”

Annalise started to object, her instinct telling her to defend Eve, even from herself, but Eve held up a hand to stop her.

“No, it’s the truth.  And now I barely recognize who I am.  I can’t believe I resorted to such a ridiculous tactic thinking it would compel you to declare your undying love for me.”  Eve rolled her eyes sardonically, before continuing. “Honestly, I think you’re right.  As much as I want you here, it’s not working.  Not like this. It’s just…it’s tearing me apart.”

Annalise could see Eve’s eyes beginning to water.  She desperately wanted to comfort her, to stop her tears from falling.  So she reached up and placed a hand on her cheek, stroking it gently before moving in closer to press their lips together.  Eve took a moment to respond and when she finally did it was with obvious hesitation -- slowly, softly, carefully.  Not full of the passion Annalise was accustomed to.

Eve was the first to pull away.

“Don’t do things like that,” she said. “It doesn’t mean anything to you. You’re only kissing me because I’m upset and you blame yourself.”

Annalise paused, staring at her. Was that true?  She _had_ kissed Eve because she wanted to comfort her.  And it _was_ her fault that Eve was upset.  At least, she thought so.  But that wasn’t the _only_ reason she’d kissed her.   But the thought of telling Eve the truth of how she felt was so frightening Annalise didn’t know if she could muster up the courage to say the words.  She was never any good at this, expressing her feelings.  Not unless those feelings were anger and disdain.  But Eve deserved at least one honest moment from her.

Annalise took several deep breaths before meeting Eve’s eyes and saying, “I can’t blame you for thinking I love you any less than you love me. I haven’t done very much to show you that…” 

Annalise heard her voice break on the last few words, so stopped to take another calming breath before continuing.

“Even when I left you, I still loved you.  I was an idiot, but still very much in love.  The only difference between us is you’re good for me, so you have no reservations about committing.  But I know I’m not good for you.  I know you deserve so much better than me.”

Eve stared at her. Annalise met her gaze, her eyes never wavering.  She wanted Eve to see the truth of her words.  She waited for Eve to admit she was right.  She searched Eve’s face for confirmation but it seemed as if Eve’s eyes were searching her expression as well. 

Suddenly, Eve cupped her face, kissing her gently before pulling her into her chest. Annalise stiffened, surprised more than anything.  But she wanted to feel like she was Eve’s for a moment, so relaxed into the embrace and rested her head on Eve’s shoulder.

“You really don't realize your worth, do you?” Eve said.

“When I'm with you, like this, I usually don't think about it,” Annalise answered honestly.

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

Annalise smiled. She knew Eve saw the world through rose-colored glasses. It didn't matter how bad of a person she was, Eve would always see the good in her first.

Annalise replied jokingly, “I think my talents in bed are blinding you to the truth.”

Eve ignored her attempt at humor. “We were friends before we were anything else.”

Annalise sighed.  She missed those times.  Things were easier back then.  There was still hope to cling on to, still the prospect of a better future.

“I’m a different person than I was 20 years ago.”

“Well, you can’t be all that different.  You’re still inclined to think the worst of yourself.”

Eve kissed the top of her head.  Annalise knew she did it just to let her know the remark was meant to be light-hearted, or at least not entirely serious.

“I’m—“ Annalise struggled to spit out the words.  “I’m afraid.”

Annalise knew the moment Eve understood what she was saying.  Eve tightened their embrace and released a long, slow breath that tickled her ear.

 “I know,” was Eve’s only spoken reply.

Annalise raised her hands to Eve’s waist, clinging the fabric of Eve’s shirt to anchor herself. 

 “Relationships are messy.”

“Ours wasn’t.  At least not until the very end.” Eve was smiling when she said it.  Annalise could hear it in her voice.

“What if I screw it up again?”

“Don't think like that.”

“I can't –“ Annalise faltered.  She closed her eyes.  For some reason it gave her more confidence.  “I can’t stand the idea of you hating me.”

“That’s good. Because I don’t like that idea either.”

Annalise pulled back from Eve’s embrace to look up at her.  She could see Eve trying to hide her smile but her entire expression was glowing.

Annalise still needed assurances though.  “Promise me, even if I screw it up.  We can still be...something.”

Eve smiled fully now. “I can't promise you we'll be best friends or anything, but if you want me in your life, I’ll be there.”

Annalise rested her forehead against Eve’s chest.  She didn’t know if what she was doing the right thing.  But it was what Eve wanted.  Heck, it was what _she_ wanted.  But she felt so selfish, like she was taking this wonderful Christmas gift and offering a stocking full of coal in return. She had to give Eve an out.

“Are you sure you want to do this?  Even after…everything?”

 “I was never the one who had any doubts.”

Annalise continued resting her head against Eve’s chest.  She was quiet for a long while, just enjoying the closeness of her.

Eve broke the silence.

“So you’re staying then?” She asked.

Annalise took a deep, steadying breath. 

“Yes,” she said, nodding slightly into Eve’s chest.

“Permanently?”

Annalise nodded again.

“Tell me,” Eve insisted.

“Yes.”

“And you're moving into my bedroom.”

Eve said this more as a statement than a question so Annalise didn’t feel the need to respond.

There was a long pause before Eve spoke next.

“And you'll make breakfast for me whenever I want?”  
  
Annalise laughed.   “I won't be cooking you any more meals for a while.  Not after that disastrous dinner last night.”  

She felt Eve shrug. 

“I don’t think that dinner turned out so badly after all,” Eve said.

Annalise snickered into Eve’s chest. She realized Eve was probably congratulating herself on having tricked her last night.  Clearly, she’d gotten what she wanted. 

Eve said, “I guess it's a good thing you started packing that suitcase.  It'll make it easier to move into my bedroom.”

“ _Our_ bedroom.”  Annalise corrected her.  
  
Eve smiled down at her.  
  
“Right. Our bedroom. “

And Eve spent the day making sure Annalise was well acquainted with her new living quarters.


	3. The Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I know I said these were supposed to be a collection of one shots, but...this is more like the first part of a three-story arc. Also, it's in Eve's POV because Annalise is either sleep or confused for most of it. So I hope you guys don't mind taking a glimpse into Eve's thoughts.

The blare of the alarm clock roused Eve suddenly and harshly from sleep. She rubbed her eyes, still groggy, and moved to turn it off but was stopped by a weight on her chest. She looked down to see Annalise still sleeping, snoring lightly. She edged herself closer to the night stand, pulling Annalise along with her, careful not to wake her. She wondered how Annalise could sleep through such an obnoxious sound. 

Once she was finally able to reach the alarm and shut it off, Eve rested back against the bed, fighting the urge to return to sleep. It actually shouldn’t have surprised her that Annalise was still stuck in dream world. Neither of them had gotten much sleep these past few days.

Eve looked down at Annalise again, running a hand through the softness of her curls. She loved the feeling of Annalise resting against her chest, limp with sleep. Her hand moved from Annalise’s hair to her back, tracing random shapes across her exposed skin. This was how she had wanted to wake up for the last 20 years. Now she planned to savor the moment. Work be damned.

Annalise had been the one to set the alarm clock last night despite Eve’s protests. It was the first time either one of them had even hinted at the idea of returning to work. They had been a couple now for less than a week and were still basking in the newness of rekindled affections. 

Eve knew she should probably wake Annalise and tell her the alarm had gone off. But she didn’t want to. If she woke her now, Annalise would probably decide to go to work. But Eve wanted her for the rest of the day. She had a surprise planned. 

So instead Eve decided to wait. She waited so long she ended up falling back asleep. The next time she awoke, she could see a hint of grey in the early morning darkness. She turned to check the clock. It was 7:00 a.m. About an hour after she’d shut off the alarm. Annalise was still asleep. Hadn’t moved an inch. 

Eve suppressed a laugh, not wanting to wake her. She didn’t remember Annalise ever being this heavy of a sleeper before. She wondered if it was her fault, if her desire was wearing Annalise out. It was selfish and boastful, but she smiled thinking that was the reason. 

Anyway, she felt kind of entitled. Annalise was always meant to be hers. But instead, she’d spent all those years with Sam – ugh, she didn’t even want to think his name. Those were supposed to be her years, their years. Annalise had a lot to make up for. She hated thinking that way; she hated that part of her that was still just so angry with Annalise, even now. But she couldn’t help it; she felt robbed, like they had meticulously planned their lives together only for Annalise to discard her with all the concern of someone tossing out an old dishrag. 

Dammit, Eve knew she had to stop thinking like that. It wouldn’t do either one of them any good. The last time she’d let those kinds of thoughts get the best of her she’d publicly humiliated Annalise in the courtroom. It felt satisfying at the time, purging those thoughts, telling Annalise how she felt. But afterwards, she was sorry for what she’d done. Annalise had seemed so broken. But more than that, Annalise had looked betrayed, staring at her as if to say, “Et tu, Brute?” Eve never wanted to see that look again.

Eve wrapped her arms around Annalise and kissed the top of her head. Unless she woke her up soon they’d be late for her surprise. 

“Annalise,” she whispered, nudging her slightly. Annalise didn’t even budge. Eve tried a few more times with no success. All right. Plan B then.

Eve turned so they were both on their sides and slid down. Neither one of them had bothered wearing clothes to bed since whatever they had on eventually just came off. She kissed Annalise gently on the lips, caressing her cheek with a thumb. Annalise stirred but did not wake. 

Eve slid down further, dragging a hand down Annalise’s chest as she went. She leaned forward taking a nipple into her mouth. She brushed her tongue over and around it, before biting it gently. Annalise tensed, then relaxed, bringing a hand to the back of Eve’s head. 

Eve slid back up. She watched as Annalise’s eyelids fluttered open.

“Why’d you stop?” Annalise asked with a sleepy smile.

“I can start again, if you want. But I thought you might want to talk instead.”

Annalise furrowed her brow. “About what?”

“Oh, you know, how’s life treating you? What’ve you been up to lately?”

Annalise laughed. “You’re such a damn tease.”

Eve leaned forward and kissed her, at the same time reaching up to fondle Annalise’s breasts, her thumb and forefinger tweaking a nipple. Annalise moaned into the kiss. Eve wanted her, again, but was just enjoying toying with Annalise for now. 

Eve pulled back, dropping her hand. “You know, I’m beginning to think you’re only interested in me for one thing. And it’s not my conversation.”

Annalise shook her head, clearly amused. 

“That’s funny. I was just thinking the same thing about you.”

“Well, can you blame me?” 

Eve lifted what little of the sheet was still on them to take in Annalise’s naked form in the dim, grey light. Her eyes trailed over Annalise’s smooth, dark skin, from the curve of her hipbone to the plumpness of her breast, devouring every inch of her.

Pretty soon, just looking wasn’t enough. Eve reached out and ran her fingertips down Annalise’s stomach, below her breasts to her belly button. She couldn’t see Annalise’s scar in the dull early morning light, but she just barely felt a line where the skin was raised. Eve leaned in and gently kissed the spot. She didn’t know why she did it. Maybe part of her just wanted to soothe an old hurt. But it clearly made Annalise uncomfortable; she pulled the sheet up to cover herself.

Eve looked up to meet her eyes.

“What are you doing?” Annalise said, frowning slightly.

“Don’t.” Eve replied.

Eve tugged the sheet back down out of Annalise’s grasp and leaned forward to kiss the scar again. It frustrated her how Annalise was always trying to hide it from her, as if she thought Eve would love her less for it. It made her think Annalise really didn’t know her at all.

Eve kissed the length of the scar, then up between her breasts and over her neck, before capturing her lips.  
Even Annalise’s taste was addictive. Eve could never get enough of kissing her. 

Annalise pushed her gently until Eve was lying on her back, Annalise on top of her, peppering her jawline with kisses. Eve closed her eyes and ran her hands along the sides of Annalise’s waist. It was moments like this that made her come undone. Annalise kissing her with a tenderness that made her feel cherished – no, more than that, wanted. 

Eve tilted her head back to signal to where she wanted her next. Annalise took the hint and placed soft kisses down her neck. Annalise was being so gentle that Eve was unprepared and gasped when she latched on to a patch of sensitive skin just above her collarbone. Annalise nipped and sucked at the flesh there, hard enough to leave a mark. But Eve didn’t care. She leaned her head back further to give Annalise better access.

Annalise held herself up with one arm, but her other hand roamed aimlessly over whatever skin was in reach. Eve thought she could put that hand to better use. She caught Annalise’s wrist and began to guide it down between her legs. She was almost there when Annalise pulled from her grasp.

Eve groaned in frustration. She squirmed as her pelvic muscles clenched in response to her growing arousal.

“Annalise,” she whined, trying to grab hold of her hand again.

“No,” Annalise mumbled between kisses to her chest. “I want to taste you.”

The words and the picture they painted, of Annalise nestled between her thighs, nearly sent Eve over the edge. She raked her fingernails across Annalise’s back, desperate now for some kind of release. But Annalise continued to take her time, lavishing attention on her breasts before slowly kissing down her stomach. 

By the time Annalise finally arrived where she wanted her, Eve wasn’t sure how much longer she could hold on. Annalise parted her folds in one long, firm lick. Eve cried out and brought her hand to rest on the back of Annalise’s head. 

Annalise’s tongue slid gently through her folds, exploring her at a slow, steady pace. Eve trembled. It was almost torment, the way she kept her on edge, using her teeth and tongue to draw out more whimpers. It was a strange thought to have at the moment, but Eve couldn’t help but feel like Annalise’s tongue had been wasted on the men in her life. 

Eve lifted up slightly just get a peek at the image she’d imagined earlier: Annalise between her thighs. Eve moaned the sight of Annalise devouring her, savoring her. She began gently massaging her scalp for encouragement. Annalise must have sensed her watching because she looked up, catching her gaze. They locked eyes, briefly, before Annalise plunged a tongue into her core. 

Eve gasped and fell back, clenching Annalise’s hair so tightly she knew it had to hurt. She felt her thighs clamp down on her, hard, but she couldn’t help it. Annalise reprimanded her by turning her mouth to her inner thigh, sucking hard at the flesh there, until Eve opened her legs a little to give her better access. 

Annalise drove her tongue into her, over and over again, until she finally came apart. Her climax hit hard, tearing a strangled cry from her throat as she shook with release. Annalise prolonged it, pushing two fingers inside of her, slowly driving them in and out, until Eve was left drained and breathless.

Annalise climbed up to her then, but kept her hand where it was, playing with her wetness. Eve flinched as she brushed over her still-sensitive clit.

“Annalise,” she said, breathing heavily. “I can’t.”

Annalise flashed a smile that Eve could only describe as smug.

“I know,” she said before removing her hand and brushing her fingertips across Eve’s lips. Eve licked over them, tasting herself. Annalise watched her closely with an expression that made Eve pull her down and crush their lips together in a bruising, biting kiss.

When they finally broke apart and Annalise lay down beside her, Eve reached for her arm, her thumb caressing the skin on the inside of her elbow. Eve wished she didn't always feel the need to be touching Annalise, holding onto her as if afraid she might somehow slip from her grasp. She had never been so touchy feely before. She wondered if Annalise noticed the change and thought it strange. 

“Annalise, I love you.” 

Eve blurted it out with all the finesse of an awkward schoolboy and was embarrassed by her delivery of it. But Annalise simply smiled at her. Eve waited to see if she would say it in return but several seconds ticked by in silence. She thought about asking her. But it wasn’t the same, was it? If someone said it only when prompted.

Eve gave up and instead asked, “Have you thought about what you want to do for Christmas?”

Annalise turned to her but seemed to be looking past her. Eve could tell by her expression that her thoughts had taken a somber turn.

After a long moment, Annalise replied, "No, it’s the first...no."

Eve knew instantly what she had been about to say. That it was her first Christmas without Sam in years. She was grateful Annalise hadn’t finished the thought. And whereas she’d been nervous about asking before, the thought of Sam and all the Christmases Annalise had spent with him, made her next question easier to ask.

“How would you like to go to my parent’s house?”

Annalise seemed about to respond but stopped herself before finally saying, “I’d like that.”

Eve studied her face, trying to see if she was being honest. 

“You’d really like to go?” Eve asked.

Annalise laughed. “Why is that so surprising? Your parents were always nice to me. Your brother’s an asshole but your parents are great.” 

Eve rolled her eyes at Annalise’s assessment but didn’t dispute it. 

“I didn’t know if you’d want to go. I thought you may feel like I was rushing things.” 

Annalise looked at her amused. “I think it’s safe to say we’re past the dating phase of our relationship. But…”

“But what?”

“Do your parents know we’re back together?” 

Eve shook her head. “I haven’t told them yet.”

Eve thought she saw a flash of disappointment in Annalise’s face. But if she had, Annalise was quick to cover it.

“Does your mom know?” Eve asked, almost as a challenge.

“Eve, you know that’s a completely different situation.”

“I guess, Annalise,” Eve said. “But you’re going to have to tell her some time.”

“I will,” Annalise said matter-of-factly. But Eve could see the worry in her eyes.

The sun had risen fully now and was casting an orange glow into the room. Annalise must have noticed it because she stared at the window, confusion on her face, before turning to the alarm clock.

“Shit,” Annalise said. “It’s 8 o’clock”

Annalise got up from bed quickly, forcing Eve to drop her hold on her arm.

“I can’t believe the alarm didn’t go off.”

Annalise switched on the light and walked over to the closet to sort through her clothes. Was she really still planning to go to work? What was the rush anyway? Eve hesitated to tell her the truth about the alarm clock, afraid she might be mad. But she really didn’t understand why Annalise was tearing through the closet in such a hurry.

“It did go off, “Eve said. “I turned it off.”

Annalise immediately stopped and turned to her.

“Why would you do that?”

Eve shrugged. “I didn’t think you’d really care.”

Eve knew that wasn’t only half-true. She had known Annalise would care a little bit, because she’d been so adamant about setting it last night. But because Annalise hadn’t given her a reason why she was so insistent about going to work, Eve didn’t think it was that important.

Annalise just shook her head and pulled an outfit of the closet. It was one of her nicer dresses, the kind she wore when she was to appear in court.

Eve said, “I don’t understand why you’re in such a rush. Do you have a hearing or something?”

“No,” Annalise answered simply, now rummaging through her dresser.

“Well, what is it then. It's not like either one of us has a boss. You afraid Bonnie is going to write you up for tardiness?"

Eve thought her last line was pretty amusing. But Annalise didn’t even crack a smile.

“No, I just – I just have to go in.”

And with that, Annalise hurried into the bathroom and shut the door. 

Eve lay back in bed, staring at the ceiling. What a horrible turn of events. She had the entire weekend planned, a trip to Montauk, but now her surprise was on the verge of ruin. Annalise still hadn’t explained why she was suddenly so interested in returning to work. Eve could just tell she was hiding something. What other reason would there be for such vague answers. 

Eve sat up in bed once she heard the bathroom door open. Annalise walked out already in her slip. Eve watched as she pulled on her dress and sat at the vanity, adjusting her wig before beginning the process of applying her makeup.

“Annalise, seriously, what’s going on? We haven’t even eaten yet. At least let me take you to breakfast first.”

“No, I don’t have time.”

“Do you want to meet for lunch then?” Eve asked.

“I – I don’t know if I can.”

Now Eve was getting annoyed. Getting a straight answer out of her was like pulling teeth, even for a question as simple as, “What’re you up to today?” And it wasn’t lost on Eve how much care Annalise was putting into applying her makeup, even as hurried as it was.

“I had a surprise planned.” Eve said, making her voice sound as sad as possible. She knew this would get Annalise’s attention and it did.

Annalise stopped applying her makeup and stared at her through the mirror.

“What surprise?”

“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?”

Annalise sighed. “I’m sorry. We’ll just have to do it another day. I wish you wouldn’t keep trying to surprise me. You know I don’t like them.”

“You’ll like this one.”

Annalise gave her an exasperated look. “You say that every time.

“And I’m right, every time.”

Annalise seemed to be mulling this over. She finally shrugged, conceding the point

“Just tell me, Annalise, why are you in such a rush. If you don’t tell me, you know I’m going to think the worst.”

Annalise turned toward her but cast her eyes down.

"I -- I have a job interview."

Eve squinted in confusion. This was the first time she’d heard of any interview. And why would Annalise need one anyway. She owned her own practice.

“Where?” Eve asked.

“Columbia.”

It took Eve a moment to process what Annalise was saying. But once she did, she was hit a wave of excitement. Columbia was a great school. And she knew Annalise liked to teach. It was perfect for her.

“Really? You're going to teach at Columbia.”

“I don't know yet. I have to get the job first.”

“Why didn't you tell me before? You don’t need to do an interview. I can just call them.”

Eve picked up her cell phone from the nightstand. She scrolled through her contacts searching for the dean of Columbia Law. Her exoneration group had a longstanding internship program with the school and several of her new hires had come from Columbia. Getting Annalise a job there would be easy.

Eve had just about found the number when Annalise took the phone from her hands and placed it back on the nightstand.

“No, don't,” Annalise said. “I don't want you to call.”

Eve stared at her. “Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to ask you to get me a job. I want to do this myself.”

“You’re not asking me. I’m offering.”

“And I’m refusing your offer.”

Eve was at a loss for words. No, she knew the word to describe how she was feeling: hurt. Maybe a small part of her understood Annalise’s desire to do this on her own. But it wasn’t like she was some stranger offering a handout. They were together now. If she had a connection, then Annalise had that connection. And after everything Annalise had been through in the past few months, didn’t she deserve something good, something easy?

“Annalise, I’m just trying to help.” 

“I know,” Annalise said, sitting beside her and cupping her face in her hands. “You’re always trying to help me. And I love that about you. But this isn’t just about getting a job. After everything that happened in Philadelphia, I need to salvage my reputation and I can’t have you tarnished by association.”

Eve opened her mouth to protest but Annalise cut her off.

“This is something I have to do on my own, Eve. I need to know that people still want me not because of who I know but because they respect me as an attorney. I need that.” 

Eve knew Annalise’s reputation had taken a hit with all the controversies surrounding her, but didn’t know how far those scandals had reached. Or, whether the dean at Columbia Law would take them into account. And, honestly, she didn’t want to take that risk. She didn’t know how Annalise would react to further disappointment. Sure, she seemed happy now, mostly, but sometimes Eve watched her and a saw a flicker of sadness in her eyes. It reminded her of that terrible time 20 years ago, when Annalise had spiraled into depression, just before their entire world was ripped apart. If Annalise didn’t want her to call, she would just have to do it without her knowing.

“All right, if you don’t want me to call then I won’t,” Eve said.

Annalise smiled, still cupping her face.

“Thank you,” she said, softly kissing Eve’s eyes, cheeks, and finally her lips.

“I have to go now or I’m going to be late.”

Annalise kissed her one last time before rushing out of the room. Eve stood up and walked into the hallway, listening for the sound of the front door closing. Once she heard it, she returned to the bedroom, picked up her phone and made the call.


	4. The Christmas Visit Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm desperately trying to finish this Christmas story before, well, Christmas but clearly time is running out so sadly that may not be possible. If I can't get it done in time, I'll probably make it a Christmas-New Year's story, we'll see. I already know what's going to happen it's just a matter of putting pen to paper. Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Annalise stood in the kitchen, filling two large thermoses with freshly brewed coffee. She’d just tightened the caps on both when Eve emerged from the back of their condo.

 “Okay, I checked again and it looks like we have everything.  Are you ready?”

Annalise nodded, then hesitated.  “Did you check the guest bathroom?”

Eve stared at her. “You don’t even use that bathroom.”

“Let me just make sure. I don’t want to forget anything.”

Annalise started towards the back but Eve caught her arm.

“Annalise, we’re going to my parents’ house, not on a safari.  If you forget something we can just buy it when we get there.”

 “It’ll just take me a second to check.”

Eve frowned. “We were supposed to leave an hour ago.  But every time we’re nearly out the door you come up with something else we have to do.  I thought you said you were okay with going to my parents’ house for Christmas.”

“I am,” Annalise insisted.  She tried to force a smile, but was sure she looked more tortured than thrilled.

Eve studied her for a moment then stepped in closer to cup her face.

“There’s no reason for you to be worried.” Eve said.

“Who says I’m worried?”

“The fact that you’re stalling says you’re worried.  How long did you think you could keep this up?  Cooking breakfast, from scratch.  Making coffee, tea, hot chocolate, freshly squeezed orange juice.  Asking me to check our bedroom five times when we both know you’re the most responsible person on the planet and would never deign to forget anything.  You must be running out of options by now.”

Annalise didn’t respond.

“My parents love you, Annalise. You know that.”

Annalise shook her head and stepped out Eve’s grasp.   

“They loved me 20 years ago.  I’m a different person now.”

“Sure, now instead of a brilliant law school student, you’re a brilliant attorney.  I think you’ve probably moved up in their estimation.”

Annalise’s eyes fell to the floor.

“I doubt it,” she muttered.

The Rothlos _had_ , at one point, liked her.  But that was before she’d broken their daughter’s heart. Before her husband’s charred remains were found in a landfill.  Before she was virtually labeled a suspect in his murder.  Before she was found shot under questionable circumstances alongside a murdered assistant district attorney.  When she’d agreed to the visit, she hadn’t thought about how much her life had changed, for the worse.  What must they think of her now?

Annalise asked, “What did they say?  When you told them we were coming?”

Eve paused, appearing to think it over.

“Mostly I remember them being happy that I was finally bringing someone to Christmas dinner.  When I told them it was you, my dad pretty much snatched the phone from my mom’s hand and said he was dusting off the chess board.”

Annalise laughed.  She had almost forgotten how much Eve’s dad loved to play her in chess despite never once winning a game.

“You see,” Eve said.  “There’s nothing to worry about.  It’ll just be the four of us, relaxing by the fire, reminiscing about old times, drinking egg nog. Maybe, there’ll be mistletoe involved.”

As Eve spoke, she wrapped her arms around Annalise’s waist and pulled her close. 

“I would never let anything bad happen to you,” Eve reassured.  “If you’re uncomfortable, even for a moment, we’ll leave.”

Annalise sighed.  Here was Eve, willing to ditch her parents for Christmas just to make her more comfortable.  Yet she could barely muster the strength to do one of the few things Eve had ever asked of her.  When had she become such a lightweight? Where was that confidence she’d worked so many years to build? The answer, she knew, rested in the night she was shot.  

Until that night, she had fooled herself into thinking she was a pillar of strength.  But as soon as Wes raised that gun, aiming to kill, her cast-iron façade melted away. There was nothing she could do to save herself.  Not when she was a child, too afraid to escape her Uncle Clyde. And certainly not now, some 30 later. In truth, she was as pitiful and weak as she ever was.  The only difference was now she’d mastered the art of pretending.

“Annalise.  Annalise.”

Eve was calling her name.

Annalise focused on Eve’s concerned expression and struggled to recall what they’d been talking about.

“Okay, we can go.” Annalise said.  “But I really do need to grab something out of the bathroom.  I’ll lock up and meet you in the car.

Eve looked at her doubtfully.

Annalise said, “I will.  I promise.”

Annalise didn’t wait for Eve’s objection. She rushed down the hallway into the guest bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet.  This was where she’d been keeping her pain pills, out of fear Eve may stumble upon them.  She popped one into her mouth and swallowed it dry, hoping it would take away her nervous edge. 

Her hand hovered over the bottle, wondering if she should take it with her.  Her original plan had been to leave it since the pills made her so drowsy.  But already she’d needed one and she hadn’t even left on the trip yet.  How was she going to survive without them? Who knew what would happen at Eve’s parents’ house.  Considering the events of the past year, she just didn’t think she had the mental fortitude to deal with any more disappoint.  It was better to just expect the worse.  Eve’s parents hated her.  They’d be hostile and unwelcoming.  If that turned out not to be the case, great.  But she would steel herself nonetheless. She grabbed the pill bottle and stuffed it in her coat pocket as she headed out the door.

It was snowing lightly as they drove out of New York and headed north to Connecticut. Neither of them said much.  Eve was busy humming along to the radio, something she only ever did when she was anxious or excited.  Annalise thought she was likely both.

The last time Annalise had seen the Rothlos was on Christmas, just before she and Eve had broken up.  Their relationship was tense even then because she had already made her decision to leave Eve for Sam.  But for months, she struggled with how to tell her.  Now she was waltzing right back into their lives as if nothing had happened.  She wondered how much Eve’s parents knew about the breakup.  If they didn’t hate her, which Eve claimed they didn’t, they must not have known much. 

Annalise turned down the volume on the car radio, silencing the god-awful rock song Eve was listening to.

“Did you ever tell your parents what happened between us?” Annalise asked.

Eve glanced at her briefly before turning her eyes back to the road.

“No, not really.  What could I say? I didn’t even know what happened between us.”

“So what did you tell them then?”

Eve was silent, her eyes still focused on the road.  Her expression remained calm, but Annalise could see her shoulders tense and her hands tighten on the steering wheel.

“I didn’t tell them you were having an affair and left me for your therapist, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

 Annalise felt the sting of her remark. “I just want to know what I’m about to step into.  What if they ask questions?”

“They’re not going to,“ Eve said with such certainty that Annalise grew suspicious.

“Did you tell them not to?”

“No, of course not,” Eve answered, shaking her head dismissively. “They just know how painful it was for me.  They wouldn’t bring it up.”

Annalise was regretting broaching the subject herself.   Her intention wasn’t to upset Eve. She just didn’t like walking into situations blind.

“I’m sorry,” Annalise said, placing her hand over Eve’s.  She rubbed her thumb across Eve’s knuckles, hoping to soothe her into relaxing her grip on the steering wheel. 

Eve looked at her and Annalise could sense she knew she was apologizing for more than just her present attempt to raise the issue.

Eve turned back to face the road and didn’t speak again.  Annalise turned up the volume on the radio and watched her for a while, waiting for her to start humming again.  But she never did.

\------------------------------

“Annalise, wake up.” Eve gently shook her shoulders, but Annalise ignored her.  She didn’t want to wake up; she was enjoying the easy peacefulness of her dream world.  But Eve was persistent and eventually she opened her eyes and looked up into Eve’s smiling face.

“We’re here.”

 “Already?” Annalise groaned, rubbing her eyes.

Eve laughed. “It’s only an hour drive.”

“Then that was the shortest hour of my life.”

Annalise looked out the front window. The towering stone and stucco mansion that belonged to Eve’s parents still took her breath away.  She could hardly believe down-to-earth Eve had grown up amongst all this wealth. Eve was more potato skins and Coronas than caviar and cognac.

“Are you ready?” Eve asked.

Annalise nodded, forcing a smile for Eve’s sake.

Once they were out of the car, Annalise reached into the back to grab one of her bags, but Eve stopped her hand. 

“They’ll send someone out to get it,” Eve explained.

Annalise shot her an amused look.

“Don’t even say it.” Eve laughed.

“The lifestyles of the rich and famous,” Annalise said, unable to resist.  “Is Robin Leach waiting for us inside?”

“Sure, laugh it up.  We’ll see what you have to say when you’re enjoying chef-prepared gourmet meals and endless massages.

Annalise spun towards her. 

“Your parents have a masseuse now? We should’ve arrived sooner.”

Eve laughed harder.

“Gotcha,” she said when she was finally able speak.

“Ugh.” Annalise shoved her playfully on the shoulder. “Don’t joke about things like that.”

“I’ll take you to the spa, if that makes you feel better,” Eve said, still chuckling. She put her hand on Annalise’s back and began leading her up the stairs.

Annalise mumbled, “As if there’s one open on Christmas Eve.”

Eve pushed the doorbell as they arrived at the front door.  Then she leaned down and whispered into Annalise’s ear.  “Well, I can give you a massage if you want one.  I’ve been told I work wonders with my fingers.”

It was at that moment that the door to flung open.  Annalise, now flustered, stood staring, not into the face of a butler as she’d been expecting, but into the faces of Eve’s mother and father.

“Are you two just going to stand there or come in out of the cold,” Eve’s mother said, taking her arm and pulling her inside. 

Neither of Eve’s parents looked very much different than they had 20 years ago.  Her father had a light dusting of grey in his dirty blonde hair, but only on the sides.  Eve’s mother, had a few lines along the edges of her eyes and corners of her mouth, but her hair was the same chocolate brunette as Eve’s, though Annalise suspected she likely dyed it.  Either way, it was obvious that exorbitant wealth could buy a few extra years of youth.

“Come in, come in,” Eve’s mom said, taking both their coats and handing them to the butler who was standing beside them. 

Eve hugged both her parents then turned to her and said jokingly,

“Mom, Dad, I’d like to introduce you to my new girlfriend.  Her name’s Annalise.”

Eve’s mom rolled her eyes.

“As if I could ever forget this face,” Mrs. Rothlo said, stepping forward and cupping Annalise’s cheeks.  “How have you been?”

The question was asked with such sincere concern that Annalise felt her tension and stress slowly begin to dissolve.

“All right,” she said.  It was the best she could do. 

“You two are definitely a sight for sore eyes.  How was the drive?” Eve’s father asked.

“I doubt Annalise remembers it.” Eve said, laughter in her voice.

Annalise glared at her.

Eve continued, “She was asleep for the bulk of it.  But it wasn’t bad.  It’s barely snowing anymore.”

“Good.  Did you have lunch yet?” Eve’s mom asked.

Eve shook her head. “No, we just had breakfast.”

Eve’s mom made a face as if she’d tasted something sour.

“I’ve seen what you eat for breakfast. You two are definitely going to need something else in your stomachs and soon.”

“Actually Annalise cooked breakfast.  She made me scrambled eggs, French toast and sausage.”

Eve’s mom looked relieved. 

“Thank, God.”

“Well, let’s not just stand by the door,” Eve’s father interjected.  “We have a surprise to show you.”

As Eve’s parents led them through the foyer, Annalise fought back her dizziness.   Eve’s parents weren’t just welcoming, they were _excited_ that she was here.  Annalise couldn’t remember a time in recent history where she’d walked into a room and people had actually been thrilled by her presence.

They walked into the living room and Annalise looked up to see a vaguely familiar face, along with three other faces.  

“Jake!” Eve exclaimed. 

And then Annalise remembered.  It was Eve’s brother.

Eve ran over and hugged him, along with the other three people standing there.  Annalise assumed they were his wife and children.  Eve had mentioned Jake was married now.

“You never told me you were coming,” Eve said, thumping him on the arm.  “I thought you were going to stay in California.”

“I wanted to surprise you.  I’m surprised Mom and Dad didn’t spill the beans.”

“We know how to keep a secret,” Eve’s dad said, seeming genuinely offended.

“This is great,” Eve said, rustling the hair of the oldest child, who looked to be only about 5 years old.

“I see you have a surprise too,” Jake said, and for the first time Annalise noticed he was staring at her.

Eve followed his gaze.  “No, not a surprise.  I told you Annalise and I were back together.”

“That _was_ a surprise,” Jake said.

Eve looked at him and Annalise saw a flash of a warning in her eyes.

Eve’s mother cleared her throat.  “Okay everyone.  I think Lois is finished with lunch.  Let’s head into the dining room.” 

The children ran ahead, screaming their excitement, as the adults trailed after them.  Annalise turned to follow them but Eve caught her arm and held her back, waiting for everyone else to leave.

“I didn’t know he’d be here,” Eve said, her voice low.

Annalise shrugged. “I know.”

Eve studied her face for a moment.

“We can go, if you want to.”

Annalise was tempted to take her up on the offer.  But how selfish was that?  To force Eve to leave her family for Christmas.  Annalise knew Eve hadn’t seen her brother since last year.

“No, let’s stay and see how it goes.”

“Are you sure?” Eve asked, concern lacing her voice.

Annalise nodded, although she wasn’t sure at all. Because she knew, maybe even more than Sam’s sister, that Jake absolutely despised her.  And she was reminded again of why she hated surprises.


	5. The Christmas Visit Part 2

As they sat down for lunch, Annalise took the farthest chair possible from Jake at the opposite end of the table. The arrangement worked out nicely. Jake seated on one side with his wife and children. Annalise, Eve and her parents on the other side. The lunch, Eve's parents revealed, had been catered to her tastes, according to Eve's instructions. There was roasted chicken, Caesar salad and scalloped potatoes. Annalise spent most of her time talking to Eve and answering a few questions from her parents. After a while, she was finally able to relax enough to actually taste the food she was eating.

"How do you like New York, Annalise?" Eve's father who was sitting on the far end of her side of the table asked.

Annalise sipped her wine, thinking it over. "It’s not my first choice. It’s far too hectic and impersonal."

“Then why move there?” Jake asked. Annalise thought his tone was condescending. She knew he was only asking the question to needle her.

"I thought I might enjoy the weather," Annalise dead-panned. 

The remark drew laughter from Eve’s father. 

Annalise, not wanting to appear rude to the rest of the family, clarified, “As chaotic as it is, the city does have its benefits.”

She reached for Eve’s hand under the table and gently squeezed it. The gesture earned her a smile.

“I had no idea you and my sister still kept in touch,” Jake said.

Annalise was about to respond but Eve beat her to it.

“We reconnected in Philly,” Eve said.

“Well, I’m glad that you did,” Eve’s mom interjected. “I can’t tell you how long it’s been since Eve’s brought someone home for Christmas.”

“Mom,” Eve grumbled, her cheeks growing red. She looked so cute, Annalise wanted to kiss her, but held back since her family was there.

“Why were you in Philly?” Jake asked.

“A case,” Eve answered simply, shoveling a spoonful of potatoes in her mouth.

“What case?” 

Jake was clearly hell-bent on continuing his obnoxious line of questions. But Eve was still chewing and Annalise opted to remain silent. She knew her answer, which involved telling Jake exactly where he could shove his intentionally invasive questions, would not go over well with either Jake or his parents.

"Ah, yeah, now I remember," Jake said. "I think I read about it. You were defending…what was his name… Nate, right? The guy accused of --"

"Jake," Eve's father boomed. "That's enough. We're here to eat. Let's leave the interrogating to the attorneys in the room."

Annalise bowed her head to hide her smile. She remembered Eve telling her that Jake had failed to get accepted into Harvard so refused to go to law school entirely. It was undoubtedly a sore point for him.

“Interrogation?” Jake said, his mouth dropping open in feigned innocence. “I’m just asking how these two ‘reconnected.’ I didn’t know it was some big secret.”

“Jake, honey…” His wife now sought to intervene, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Fine,” Jake mumbled. “Let’s ignore the giant elephant in the room.”

Annalise stood up.

“I'm feeling a bit tired. Is there somewhere I can lie down for a bit?"

It couldn’t be past three in the afternoon, but dealing with Eve’s family was exhausting. Besides, she was sure the tension in the room was a direct result of her presence there. 

"Of course,” Eve’s mom said, standing. “We have your rooms all set up.”

“Rooms?” Eve questioned, emphasizing the “s.” Annalise had noticed that too.

“Well, I didn’t know if you’d want one room or two,” Mrs. Rothlo said.

“Mom, we’re here together. Of course we just want one room.”

Eve’s mom shook her head in exasperation.

“How was I supposed to know that? Jake and Natalie requested separate rooms. I don’t know what couples are doing nowadays.”

Both Annalise and Eve turned to Jake and his wife; Jake had suddenly become very interested in his food, and Natalie was wiping her child’s already clean face.

Eve turned back to her mother and said quietly, “You can put us in the same room. Which one did you have in mind? I can show Annalise.” 

After getting the instructions from her mother, Eve took Annalise’s hand and led her up a staircase that left her panting from exertion, through corridor after corridor, before they finally arrived at their room. As soon as Eve opened the heavy door and Annalise got a peek inside, she fell in love.

“Did we get an upgrade?” Annalise asked.

Eve laughed. “Actually we did. The rooms on this side are hardly ever used, but my mom had them cleaned for us. She thought we may want some privacy.”

Annalise walked around the room, her eyes traveling across the ceiling and to every corner. There was a huge fireplace and a balcony overlooking the back of the estate, which was covered in snow. The bed was huge, even larger than a king size. The room also had its own master bathroom, with a bathtub that looked more like a jacuzzi.

Annalise fell back onto the bed, her feet dangling off the side.

“How long are we staying here again? Can we stay forever?” 

“We can stay as long as you want,” Eve said, laughing.

Annalise closed her eyes. The bed was just as comfortable as it looked. It felt like she was melting into the mattress. Goldilocks, she thought, was an idiot. There was no such thing as “too soft.” She definitely would’ve taken Mama bear’s bed. 

Annalise felt a tug at her boots as Eve unzipped them and slid them off. Moments later, the mattress shifted. Annalise opened her eyes and saw Eve had settled over her waist, knees planted on either side of her hips. Her long brunette hair was hanging down like a canopy, tickling her cheeks.

Annalise smiled. “Your parents are going to notice if you’re missing for too long.”

Eve shrugged. “Probably.” 

She was already tugging Annalise’s blouse from the waistband of her skirt. 

“What if they come to check on us?” Annalise asked.

“I doubt they’ll come through that door.” Eve said, now loosening the buttons.

“How can you be sure?”

Annalise lifted up as Eve pulled the shirt from her arms and tossed it to the floor.

Eve said, “Anyone who steps into that hallway is going to know what we’re doing.”

Annalise laughed. “Not if you keep quiet.”

Eve unclasped her bra and tossed it aside as well. Annalise, now exposed, felt the tingle of goosebumps from the chill in the room.

“And what about you?” Eve asked.

“I’m not the screamer.”

“We’ll see.” 

Eve licked her finger and traced a spiral around her nipple, closing in on it, before rolling it between her thumb and forefinger.

Annalise gasped.

“That’s not playing fair,” Annalise said, pressing herself back into the bed. Eve knew full well her nipples were still sore from their exploits the night before.

“All’s fair in love and war,” Eve replied, leaning down and taking the tender bud into her mouth. Annalise clenched the sheets in her hands, as Eve nipped and suckled until she finally proved that Annalise did, in fact, have a healthy set of lungs.

Eventually, they both fell asleep, exhausted. Annalise stirred awake first, surprising even herself.  
She turned to Eve, who was still sleeping soundly, and combed a hand through her hair, allowing the dark, silky locks to fall through her fingers. Eve's lips turned up into a small smile, as her fingertips brushed along her scalp. Annalise watched her and repeated the motion. Even in law school Eve had smiled in her sleep when she ran her hands through her hair. It was one of the few times Annalise ever felt like she was making Eve happy.

The pain pill Annalise had taken earlier had worn off and she was feeling restless now. Like she could run a marathon. Well, if she were a runner. She sat up in bed, not bothering to bring the sheet along with her to cover her nakedness. She didn't want to just sit here, but she also didn't want to go downstairs and rejoin Eve's family without Eve. Annalise was weighing her options, when she caught sight of her luggage in a corner of the room. It hadn't been there before.

"Eve. Eve." Annalise said, shaking her awake.

Eve grumbled.

"Someone brought in our luggage," Annalise said.

Eve squinted up at her, clearly confused, before dropping her head back down on the bed.

"So?" Eve mumbled.

"That means they were in here, when we were in here."

"And? You woke me up for that?"

Annalise glanced at the door suspiciously. 

"Do you think they came in here when we were having sex? And we didn’t notice?”

Eve laughed into the pillow.

"Who cares? It was probably just one of the staff. When did you become such a prude anyway?”

Annalise pulled the pillow out from under Eve’s head, and tossed it at her.

“Hey!” Eve exclaimed..

Annalise wondered if it was a rich people thing to have so little concern for privacy.

“Listen, I enjoy sex as much as the next person. I just don’t want the whole world knowing about it, especially your family.”

"We've been up here for how long? Trust me, they know. Wait, is it Christmas yet?" Eve asked, her voice sounding more awake.

Annalise glanced at the clock on the bedside table. It was just after 7.

"No, but close."

Eve sighed and lied back down.

"I suppose we should go downstairs. If we were just going to spend the holidays in bed, we could've done that home."

"I'm going to take a shower first." Annalise said, sliding out of bed. She was halfway to the bathroom door when she heard the patter of bare feet on wood flooring behind her. 

"Me too," Eve said, following her. 

Annalise laughed. "I thought you said we needed to go downstairs." 

Eve placed a hand on her back and nudged her into the bathroom.

"We will...eventually."

By the time they did finally make it downstairs, Christmas was just three short hours away. They checked the living room first. Seeing no one there, Eve suggested they head to the bar, which was apparently one of her father's favorite rooms. Annalise liked him all the more for it.

 

"Well, look who finally decided to join us," Eve's father said as they stepped into the room. Only Eve’s parents were there, sitting on stools in front of a big screen television hanging from a wall, snifter glasses filled with eggnog in their hands.

"Sorry,” Eve said. “We were kind of tired."

"Did you girls get unpacked," Eve's mom asked.

"Yes," Annalise answered at the same time Eve answered, "No."

Eve's father chuckled and took a swig of his drink.

Eve shot her a questioning look. Annalise thought they should have a better excuse for why they were missing for more than six hours than, "we took a nap."

"Where's Jake?" Eve asked, walking behind the bar and pouring herself and Annalise, glasses of eggnog from a pitcher. Annalise sat on a stool as Eve slid a drink toward her.

Eve's mom said, "They put the kids to bed about an hour ago. I guess they must've fallen asleep too."

"In separate rooms?" Eve questioned.

Her mother waved a hand at her, dismissively.

"I don't know, Eve. If you want to know about your brother's marriage, ask your brother."

"They're having problems." Eve's father promptly offered. "It's hard for them, living on the other side of the country, away from their family, with two kids. I keep telling him to move back here, but it's as if he thinks that would be admitting failure. That he couldn't do it on his own."

“You talked with him about it?” Eve asked.

“Several times,” her dad answered. “And I think…”

“What?”

“That pharmaceutical company he owns, I think it’s in a bit of financial trouble.”

“What makes you say that?” Eve asked.

Annalise was beginning to feel like this was a conversation she should not be privy to.

“Just a feeling I have,” Eve’s dad replied. “He would never ask for a loan, though I’d be more than willing to give him one. But I get the impression he wants to ask.”

Eve nodded. “I’ll look into it.”

“You don’t have to get involved. I don’t want to put this burden on you.”

Eve shrugged and sipped her drink.

“If it’s worrying you, I want to help. I’ll see what I can find out.”

It wasn’t until his shoulders dropped, relaxing, that Annalise noticed how tense Eve’s father had been. She wondered how serious the issue was and whether Eve’s father had actually revealed everything he knew.

“Come on, Jim,” Eve’s mother said, taking her husband’s hand. “We should get to bed. We have an early morning ahead of us.”

“You guys are leaving already?” Eve complained. “We just got down here.”

“Well, Eve, if you were that concerned you should’ve joined us sooner,” her mom said.

“And you, young lady, still owe me a chess match.” Eve’s father said, pointing a finger at Annalise.

Annalise stifled a laugh. First, it had been a full 20 years since she’d been called, “young lady,” but she guessed it was relative. Secondly, she’d never met anyone so eager to play a game they always lost.

“If you want to give me the chance to add to my winning record, so be it,” Annalise said.

“We’ll see,” Eve’s father replied, smiling.

“Let’s go, Jim,” Eve’s mother said, tugging his arm. “Leave these two lovebirds alone.”

Eve groaned, blushing. 

“Good night,” her mother called out as they left. “And don’t stay up too late. Breakfast is at 8 a.m., sharp.”

Annalise waited until they were gone, then said, “Your parents are great.”

“No, they’re embarrassing.” Eve sat down on a bar stool beside her.

“Well, I love them.” Annalise said, hesitating before adding, “I’m glad you convinced me to come with you.”

Eve answered her with a smile so full and radiant, Annalise felt her cheeks grow warm and had to look away.

“I’m sorry I gave you so much trouble about it,” Annalise said, her head bowed.

“Don’t apologize. ” Eve cupped her cheeks and lifted her face until their eyes met. “You were nervous. You had every right to be. Even I was nervous. I thought, ‘what if she comes here and has a horrible time? What if my parents say something ridiculous and scare her away.’ But I saw how nervous you were and didn’t want to freak you out even more with my own nervousness.”

Annalise laughed. “I never thought I’d say this to anyone, but apparently you’re a better actress even than me.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go that far,’ Eve replied, taking her hand and pulling her from the stool.

“Where are we going,” Annalise asked. She remembered her egg nog and reached back quickly to grab it from the bar countertop.

Eve said, “I plan to usher in Christmas with you at exactly midnight. So we’re going to watch ‘A Christmas Story’ marathon for the next three hours to stay awake. “Are you game?”

Annalise nodded. “I want to do whatever you want to do.”

It was true. Annalise only mildly enjoyed ‘A Christmas Story,’ and only for the part where the boy’s tongue gets stuck to a frozen pole, but at this moment she wanted to watch it because Eve did. And she wanted to stay up until midnight because that’s what Eve wanted. Eve could have asked her to do almost anything right now, and she would have willingly complied.

So they stayed up, cuddling on the sofa, drinking eggnog, and laughing, sometimes at the movie, most often at inside jokes. They watched the movie nearly two full times, but neither of them was bored. Annalise was only half paying attention to it anyway. Mostly, she was watching Eve and her reactions, noticing the little things she thought she’d forgotten about her after all these years, like how she tucked her hair behind her ear mid-laugh and bit the corner of her lip when she was anxious or uncertain.

When midnight rolled around, Eve turned to her and kissed her, then led her upstairs to the bedroom for an encore of what they shared earlier that afternoon.

The next morning, everyone who'd been dreaming of a white Christmas got their wish, tenfold. It was a full-blown blizzard outside. As they ate breakfast, Annalise stared at the haze of whiteness through the patio window and was grateful for the warmth inside.

"We'll get a taste of that pretty soon." Eve's father said. 

Annalise followed his gaze out the window.

"A taste of what?" She asked, setting down her forkful of scrambled eggs. He couldn't possibly be suggesting what she thought.

Eve's father laughed. 

"I know it's been 20 years, but you haven't forgotten the Rothlo family tradition, have you?"

Annalise looked around the table. Everyone was smiling and staring at her as if they were all part of some inside joke. Even the children were giggling. She thought back. Rothlo family tradition? How the hell was she supposed know about it? She hadn't been here that often. And even if she had known about this tradition at one point, that was two decades ago. Her memory was impeccable, not superhuman. Besides, she'd remember a tradition that forced her to step out into a blizzard. She'd never done that or even played outside in the snow really, except...

Annalise could tell Eve's father saw the flash of realization cross her face. His smile widened.

"I’ll sit this one out," Annalise said, shaking her head and resuming her meal. There was no question; she wasn't going outside in a blizzard to have a snowball fight.

"Oh, come on!" The entire table reacted in unison.

"It's a family tradition," Eve's father insisted. 

Annalise had been about to say that she wasn't in this family. But Eve was looking at her, wide-eyed and smiling.

Eve's mom said, "I remember when you were here last time. You had so much fun."

Annalise took a long sip of her mimosa, wishing it had been made with about a bottle more champagne.

"I did have fun," she agreed. "But that also wasn't during a snowstorm."

"That makes it funner," one of the children, the oldest, piped in. 

Annalise suddenly realized she didn't even know their names.

"Well, you all have fun then," she said, standing up. "I'm feeling a bit tired. I think I'm going to go take a nap."

Again, it felt like the entire table groaned in disappointment, even Jake, who was smirking at her. She was sure he'd love to get her outside in a snowball fight. He would never get the chance though. 

She made a quick exit, despite wanting to finish her breakfast and not actually feeling tired. Eve caught up with her at the bottom of the stairs.

"I'm not doing it, Eve," she said before Eve could speak. "I’m not going outside in a blizzard to be pelted by snow.”

Eve approached her, smiling. “No one said you had to. I’m not going to force you. Not that I could anyway."

Eve clasped her sweater at the waist and pulled her forward until she was flush against her.

"I have to do it because it's tradition,” Eve said. “But the weather is terrible. I'd rather stay inside with you."

Annalise exhaled, relieved. "I'm glad I'm in love with the sensible one in this family. Have they ever heard of pneumonia?"

Eve tensed.

"What did you just say?" she asked quietly.

Annalise looked up at her and frowned, afraid she may have offended her with her teasing.

“I’m just kidding, Eve. I’m sure your family is perfectly sensible…usually.”

“No, what you said, say it again,” Eve responded.

Annalise went over the words in her head again, and repeated them slowly, with a great deal of hesitation.

"I'm glad I’m in love --"

"Right there," Eve interrupted her. "Repeat that part again."

Annalise laughed.

“I’m serious,” Eve insisted. “You never say it.”

Eve was smiling, but Annalise could see a hint of sadness in her eyes. 

“Eve, you know how I feel about you. Why should I have to talk about it all the time?”

Eve took a step back.

“I’m not saying ‘all the time.’ But it would be nice to hear every once in a while. I swear that’s the first time you’ve said it since we’ve been together.”

Annalise sighed. Everyone was so obsessed with words. But words were meaningless. Of the few people who had told her they loved her over the years, she didn’t believe a single one of them. The only person she knew did truly love her had never spoken the phrase. She didn’t have to. She’d burned her own house to the ground, to save her daughter. Actions mattered, not words.

“I really don’t want to get into this,” Annalise said. 

Eve turned away.

“Sometimes people like to hear it, Annalise. Don’t you like it when I say it to you?”

Annalise thought about it and she did.

“Yes, but–“

Annalise stopped herself, afraid of making the situation worse.

“But what?” Eve pressed.

“Nothing,” Annalise waved away the thought and started up the stairs. “It’s Christmas, we shouldn’t be arguing about this.”

Eve caught her arm.

“But what, Annalise? What were you going to say?”

Annalise turned towards Eve but kept her eyes trained on the ground. 

“It’s just – you can’t be sure you’re in love with me.”

Eve dropped her arm. Annalise wasn’t looking at her, but she could envision her expression: surprise and disappointment. It was an expression she’d seen often in the past few months.

“I don’t even know what that means.” Eve said.

Annalise knew she should probably shut up, but the thought had been nagging at her ever since that night Eve came to her home in Philadelphia to apologize for her courtroom antics. Eve had said then that a part of her still loved her, but she barely even knew her, not the present-day her. Eve was really in love with the bright-eyed, ambitious, fun Annalise from law school. She could never be that person again and the broken, battered mess she was now could never compare.

Annalise took a deep breath and plowed ahead.

“I believe you think you love me,” she said, her eyes never leaving the ground. “But Eve I’m a completely different person than I was 20 years ago. You just haven’t realized that yet. When you do…”

Annalise didn’t want to finish the sentence; she felt numb just thinking about where inevitably this would lead.

“I can’t believe you actually think that,” Eve said, an edge of frustration in her voice. “I’ve told you a million times how I feel. I don’t know what more I can do. But at some point you have to –“

“What’s this? Trouble in paradise?” Annalise heard the voice of the person she least wanted to hear.

She looked up to see Jake approaching them.

“No,” Eve said. “I was just going to grab my coat.”

But Annalise could see in his eyes that he knew they’d been arguing. He had likely been eavesdropping. She just wondered for how long.

“Well, we’re waiting,” Jake said to Eve, but he was looking at Annalise, never taking his eyes off her.

“Okay, um, I’ll be right back,” Eve said.

Eve turned and looked at her for a long moment as if she wanted to say something else. But Jake was there, not leaving, so she placed a hand on her shoulder briefly then ran upstairs. Annalise thought to follow her up but decided against it. They’d probably just argue.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Jake interrupted her thoughts.

Annalise, only half-paying attention to him, shook her head. 

“No, I’ll probably just read or something.”

“I thought you said you were tired.”

Annalise caught his stare, fixed on her with an expression she could only describe as calculating. 

“I guess I got my second wind,” Annalise said, brushing past him and heading straight for the bar. 

Annalise poured herself glass after glass of vodka. She realized this Christmas was turning out just as poorly as the last one. She was alone and drinking. That seemed to be her plight in life ever since Sam’s death. 

She felt better about it though, the more she drank. But soon she began to worry the Rothlos would realize she’d raided their alcohol stash. She headed back to the dining room, vodka glass in hand, and peeked out the patio window. Eve and her family were still out there, throwing snowballs. She couldn’t make out any of their faces in the white blur of snow, but she could see a flash of color here and there from their winter coats.

“You could still join in.” A voice said, just behind her.

Annalise jumped nearly dropping the glass in her hand.

“Shit,” she said, turning to see Jake. “Don’t you know it’s rude to sneak up on people like that?”

“Sorry,” Jake said without a hint of remorse. 

Annalise looked back and forth between him and the patio window.

“What are you doing in here?”

“Sammy had sniffles. I had to get her inside and put her back in bed.”

Ah, Annalise thought, that must have been the youngest child, a girl. At least she knew one of their names now.

Jake stepped up beside her and looked out the window.

“She seems happy,” he said.

Annalise knew he was talking about Eve now. An awkward silence hung in the air between them. She was just about to walk away and head upstairs, when he said,

“We both know it won’t last.”

Annalise froze.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jake looked at her briefly, before glancing back out the window.

“You should’ve seen her, when you left. Before you, she was the most optimistic person I knew. After... I’ve never seen her so broken. “

Annalise stared at him, her face growing hot. What happened between her and Eve was none of his business. How dare he confront her on it? She wanted to challenge his account of events, but Eve had never really spoken about what happened after their breakup. She only knew she’d received call after call from Eve, one pleading message left after another. She’d never returned any of them.

“And here I was thinking I was doing you a favor,” Annalise replied. “You never liked me. I thought you would’ve been happy I was out of her life.”

Jake laughed, but it was an empty, hollow sound.

“I knew from the moment I met you that you weren’t good enough for my sister. And I was right.”

The remark stung. Not simply because of who’d spoken it, but because Annalise recognized the truth of it. But she’d never admit that, not to Jake.

“Oh, please,” Annalise said, dismissively. “You just couldn’t stand the thought of my dark skin tainting your white privilege.”

Jake looked at her, surprise on his face. “I’m not racist.”

Annalise didn’t know for sure if he was or not, but she’d long suspected it. He’d never liked her, but had given her no reason why. 

"I don't care what you are. But what your sister and I do is none of your concern,” Annalise said.

“You’re right, it’s not. But when you cheat on her, again, it’s going to be me picking up the pieces… again.”

Annalise was stunned into silence. He knew? He couldn’t know; he had to be bluffing. Eve had said she didn’t tell her family the details of their breakup. She wouldn’t have lied about that.

Annalise was quiet for so long, Jake narrowed his eyes, studying her face and saw the surprise there.

He laughed. “You didn’t think I knew? Of course, I do. Eve told me about you and your therapist. Or, husband, I should say.”

Annalise faltered, unable to respond. Because now it was clear that Eve had lied. Eve had told her brother --her annoying, asshole of a brother -- everything. If he didn’t have a good reason to hate her before, he surely did now. And there was nothing she could say to defend her actions. What she had done to Eve was unforgivable. But she shouldn’t have to explain herself, not to him. 

“We both know how this ends, Annalise. Eventually, you will break her heart again. But you need to think about the damage you’re going to do to her, to this family, in the meantime. Do you think any of us haven’t seen the news? That we don’t know what happened to your husband or with that district attorney? It’s not your skin color that’s going to taint us. It’s you, and the chaos you bring.”

Annalise had heard enough. She struggled to find the breath to respond. But what response was there? Was he wrong? She didn’t know. Or maybe she did know and was too afraid to admit the truth. 

Without a word, she turned and rushed upstairs to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her and leaning back against it. The tightness in her throat was suffocating; she swallowed thickly. Her eyes stung; she blinked, trying to push back tears but the wetness was already streaming down her face. She slid down to the floor, no longer trying to hold back her emotions. Why was she crying? Why had she allowed Jake to get to her? He was a mean, hateful person. But had he said anything that wasn’t true? God, she wanted Eve right now. She wanted Eve desperately to hold her. But what right did she have to Eve? She was a destructive force in so many people’s lives. What good had she ever done? All she left was chaos and destruction in her wake. 

There was no way she could stay here and continue this façade with Eve’s family. She pulled her suitcase from the closet. Most of her clothes were still inside, unpacked. She grabbed her toiletries from the bathroom and stuffed them in the suitcase. She had nearly finished when the door opened and Eve stumbled in, still in her winter gear, giggling.

“That was so much fun. You have no idea what you just missed. I pelted my dad right in the –“

Eve stopped short as she walked towards Annalise, seeing her face for the first time.

“Annalise?” Eve said, her eyes moving over her tear-stained face. “What’s wrong?”

The concern in Eve’s voice instantly unraveled the thin thread of composure she’d been so desperately clinging onto. She was sobbing heavily now. Unable to speak, she gasped a few times.

"I want go home," Annalise finally managed to say, weakly.

Eve took her arm, pulled her over to the bed and sat her down. 

“Annalise, you’re scaring me. Did something happen?” Eve asked, rubbing her back.

“No,” Annalise said between sobs. “I just don't want to be here anymore.”

“Is this about the argument we had earlier? I’m sorry, if I—“

“It’s not about that," Annalise cut her off. "I just want to go. Now."

Eve replied, her voice soft, “If you tell me what’s wrong, maybe I can fix it.”

Annalise laughed through her tears and knew she must look crazy. How many times had she come to Eve asking her -- begging her to fix some problem in her life? But some things were irreparable.

"I don't want you to fix anything," Annalise said. She stood to put some distance between. 

"You said if I wanted to go we could leave. Well, I want to go."

Eve glanced at her packed suitcase then stared up at her.

"Annalise, it's a blizzard outside. We can't go anywhere."

Annalise had been so desperate to leave she'd forgotten about the snowstorm. But that wasn't going to stop her. She didn't belong here. She suddenly felt out of place. And she didn't want to face Jake again. He would never confront her with Eve around but every horrible truth he'd spat at her was still ringing in her ears.

"I'll drive, if you're not comfortable with it.”

Eve looked at her as if she'd just said she wanted to drive to the moon.

"You couldn't see five feet in front of you out there,” Eve said. “No one's driving. It's too dangerous."

"Fine, we can take a cab." 

It would cost her a fortune, but Annalise knew she'd be able to find a cab driver willing to take her to New York, even in a blizzard.

Eve was quiet, staring at her with wide, disbelieving eyes. 

"That’s ridiculous," Eve said. ”It's no safer taking a cab than it would be if you were driving yourself. We’re not going. And I'm done talking about it."

"You can't stop me. I'm not staying here."

Eve exhaled loudly, clearly trying to signal her frustration. She then stood and paced the room. 

"Did something happen?" Eve asked, turning suddenly to face her.

Annalise remained silent.

Eve ran her hand roughly through her hair.

"I don't get it Annalise. One moment, you're on cloud 9, laughing and joking. The next, you're like...this." Eve gestured towards her. "I never know which version of you I’m going to get. How is it going to look to my family if we leave on Christmas Day? Have you thought about that? What am I supposed to tell them?"

Annalise hadn't thought about it. All she could see was her goal: getting the hell off this property. She hadn’t considered the fallout Eve would face with her family. God, she could be so inconsiderate sometimes. The oversight was just more evidence that she was clearly not the type of person to consider how her actions affected others. Jake should probably add "selfish" to his list of grievances against her. 

But she refused to allow Eve to stop her. She couldn’t stay here. It felt like she was suffocating under the weight of her own lies. She was tired of pretending. Everyone here knew who she was. Eve had told Jake everything about their breakup, including her affair. Annalise doubted Jake had kept that knowledge secret. He would relish the chance to slander her. Eve probably had her reasons for telling him, maybe she’d needed a shoulder to cry on. But she wished Eve had forewarned her. She’d been completely blind-sided and made to look like a fool.

And then there were the sordid details of her last few months in Philadelphia. She'd assumed Eve's family had seen the news about her troubles. Jake had simply confirmed her suspicions. It must have been tiring for them, pretending they didn't know and didn’t care, just as it was tiring for her to pretend she was someone else. Someone better than who she really was. Someone deserving of Eve. Someone her family wouldn’t be ashamed of. What must they think of her?

"You're right," Annalise said. "You should stay here with your family. I'll go."

"That's not a solution," Eve countered, raising her voice slightly. "Why can't you just tell me what's wrong? Is it me? Did I do something?"

Annalise didn't respond. She knew Eve would interpret her silence as confirmation that she had somehow spoiled the trip. And if Eve blamed herself, she'd be more inclined to allow her to leave.

"Are you going to tell me what I did?" Eve pressed.

Annalise held out her hand. "Are you going to give me your keys?" 

They locked eyes, challenging each other in a battle of sheer will. When it became obvious that neither would budge, Annalise knew what she had to do to tip the scales. Jake was right. This relationship was bound to fail. They were incompatible on so many levels merging their lives together would be impossible. She should end it here before either one of them ended up more hurt.

“Give me the keys, Eve. I don’t want to be here...with you. It was a mistake to even come here.”

Eve stared at her.

“Annalise, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying I’m done. I’m done pretending. You want to know why I never say, ‘I love you?’ Because I don’t. All this time I’ve been trying to make amends for what I did to you 20 years ago. But I’m done paying for past mistakes. This is not how I want to spend my Christmas. Give me the keys.”

Annalise said it all in one breath. It was the only way she could get the words out.

“Annalise...You don’t mean that,” Eve said, her voice low and so full of hurt Annalise started to move towards, instinctively wanting to comfort her, but stopped herself.

“I do mean it.”

Eve’s eyes searched her face. Annalise guessed she was trying to find some hint that what she’d just said wasn’t true. But she’s never find what she was looking for. Annalise knew how to bluff; she made a living out of it.

“Fine,” Eve said. Annalise could see the shimmer of unshed tears in her narrowed eyes. “Do what you do best, Annalise. Run. But I’m done chasing after you.”

With that, she threw the keys on the bed and walked out, slamming the door behind her. 

Annalise sat down on the bed, staring down at her hands, already regretting what she’d done. Maybe she’d taken it too far. She was never supposed to hurt Eve.Her first thought was to apologize. She wanted to run to Eve and beg her for forgiveness. But how could she expect forgiveness after the horrible things she’d said? She couldn’t just keep hurting Eve then asking for a second, third, fourth chance. It was a cruel cycle, and it wasn’t fair to Eve. She deserved so much more. There was really only one option now. She had to leave. She picked up the keys from the bed and wheeled out her suitcase.

As she sat in the car in the driveway, trying to work up the nerve to hit the gas pedal, she remembered the pain pills she’d stuffed in her coat pocket on the way here. Before she could convince herself out of it, she quickly found the bottle, opened it and swallowed two of them. It was a dumb thing to do. It was a stupid, stupid thing to do. But her hands were shaking and she couldn't drive like that. She had force herself to calm down.

It took a few minutes, but the pills finally began to work. Her mind relaxed and her hands stilled enough for her to clasp the steering wheel. She pressed down on the pedal, driving into the blinding whiteness of the snowstorm. 

Eve had been right; it was very difficult to see. But she drove slowly and had the assistance of her iPhone GPS when it came to where to turn. It was so hazy outside she could barely see the street signs. 

There were only a few other cars on the road. Actually, she’d only spotted three others since she’d left. But she didn’t mind it though. It was actually a relief: fewer obstacles on the roadway. She leaned back in her seat and loosened the death grip she had on the steering wheel. This wasn’t so hard. She was making steady progress and the car hadn’t slid once. She thought about stopping at a hotel to stay the night, but it was Christmas. She’d spend her last Christmas in a hotel. She wasn’t about to do that again. 

If she hadn’t been so stubborn she could be spending Christmas with Eve right now. They’d be sitting by the fireplace, opening the gifts they’d gotten for each other. Shit, she’d forgotten Eve’s gift at the house. She should’ve taken it with her. It was such a sentimental gift Eve would be confused by it, especially considering the horrible things she’d just said to her. But it was too late now. She couldn’t go back. She wished she’d just told Eve what Jake had said. It would’ve made things so much easier. Eve would’ve held her and told her everything he said was a lie. She would’ve told her that she was a good person. Annalise wouldn’t have believed her, of course, but she liked hearing her say it. 

Annalise was growing tired. So much so that she didn’t notice when she passed a traffic light, glowing a dull red in the bright whiteness of the snow. She didn’t notice the tractor-trailer speeding down the road, passing under a traffic light, glowing green. All she heard was the sound of metal grinding against metal. Suddenly, she was being tossed around in the car like a rag doll. Then, her head hit the windshield and everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't send me hate mail. There's a third part coming.


	6. The Christmas Visit Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I seriously didn't mean to leave that cliffhanger going for so long but what can you do, right? Hopefully you guys will forgive and for get after this latest installment. =)

“You let her drive off in a snowstorm?” Eve’s mother asked for what felt like the hundredth time.

Eve sighed as she poured hot water over a bag of lavender tea. Annalise had left nearly an hour ago. Her mother and father had been questioning her ever since.

“I didn’t let her do anything. Annalise does what she wants.”

“It’s dangerous, Eve,” her mother argued. “You really shouldn’t have allowed her to go out there.”

“What did you want me to do? Lock her in the room?”

“She couldn’t have gone anywhere without your car,” her dad interjected. “Did she just take the keys?”

Eve paused.

“No. I gave them to her.”

“You gave her your car keys to drive out into a blizzard?” Her father raised his eyebrows in disbelief.

“Did you two have an argument?” Her mother asked.

Eve hadn’t told her parents what happened between her and Annalise, only that Annalise had left. But she still thought it was a silly question. She was tempted to answer, _Oh no, we were getting along swell. That’s why Annalise decided she’d rather spend Christmas Day navigating through a snowstorm than with me._

“I don’t really feel like talking about it,” Eve said, sipping her tea. It burned going down her throat, but she found the sensation oddly comforting. “Where are Jake and the kids?”

“They’re in the living room, opening gifts,” her mom answered.

“We should join them. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to miss the excitement.”

Eve walked away before her parents had a chance to respond. She was tired of the inquisition.

By the time she arrived in the living room, the kids were nearly finished opening their gifts. She shot Jake a nasty look when she discovered he hadn’t even bothered to wait for her so she could see her niece and nephew open the gifts she and Annalise had bought them: a doll set from Disney’s “Frozen” and a quadcopter, respectively.

Eve sat on the couch watching her niece and nephew play with some of their new toys. She wished she could have it that easy: to simply want something and have it appear gift-wrapped under your tree.

Natalie tracked down the gifts for the adults, digging through piles of wrapping paper sprawled across the floor in front of the Christmas tree. She handed three of the presents to Eve: one from her and Jake, another from Eve’s parents, and a small package from Annalise.

Eve stared at the gift from Annalise, fingering the ribbon tied around it. She wondered if she should even open it. Annalise probably meant to take it with her but forgot in her hurry. Eve looked up to see her parents staring at her. She set Annalise’s gift aside and opened the other ones. First, she unwrapped the gift from her parents: a beautiful black leather Prada purse. From her brother and his wife, a Breville Espresso Machine. Apparently, they knew her well.

Eve barely paid attention to everyone else opening their gifts. She smiled and nodded at the thanks she received, but mostly she just stared at the unopened gift from Annalise. She wondered what you would give someone who you were only pretending to be in love with. Everything had seemed so perfect. Annalise seemed happy too. But it had all been a sham. Annalise had admitted she was only with her as some form of repentance for breaking her heart 20 years ago. Well, that paled in comparison to what she felt now.

When Annalise left her the first time, she held on to some hope they could be reunited. Of course, that hope died away bit by bit the longer they were apart but it was always there. This, however, was their second attempt at a relationship. And just like the first one, it had ended in disaster. It was clear now more than ever that despite all her wishing and wanting, Annalise just did not love her. All this time Annalise had been with her out of pity and remorse. How foolish was she to have actually believed the ruse? But then again, Annalise had been very convincing. It was strange. Annalise had always been good at hiding her feelings, but never faking them. Not with her, at least.

“I’ll be right back,” Eve said, slipping away before anyone could voice an objection.

Eve headed upstairs to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her and falling onto the bed, Annalise’s gift in her hand. Why bother stalling? She would eventually open it anyway. Her curiosity was too strong. She carefully unraveled the wrapping paper, wanting to preserve it although she didn’t know why. Inside was a book. Her eyes quickly scanned the title. She smiled. Ernest Hemingway’s A Moveable Feast. She ran her fingers across the dust jacket then along the sides of the untrimmed pages. It was clearly a first edition copy. She opened the cover. Make that a signed first edition copy.

As she thumbed through the book’s worn pages, an envelope fell out. She opened it and pulled out a Christmas card. She smiled at the cover: an image of the Sacré-Cœur with Merry Christmas scrawled across the bottom. It had to be a custom card; she didn’t know where Annalise would’ve purchased this otherwise. She opened it and read it.

_Eve,_

_As I’m sure you remember, I’ve never been a great gift-giver. You’ll recall the red, suede cowgirl boots I bought you one year. I hope this gift helps atone for that one. I thought about what to give the woman who has everything. A woman who also happens to be the most important person in my life. I wanted to give you the City of Love itself, but apparently Paris does not fit so neatly into a box. I hope to one day make our dream of living there come true. You’ve given me so much since you came back into my life. I know I should tell you this more often, but I love you more than you can possibly imagine. And I hope this is just the start of many more holidays to be spent together._

_Merry Christmas,_   
_Annalise_

Eve read the card at least a dozen times before putting it down. Then she picked it up and read it again. It wasn’t until she was crying and afraid her tears would ruin the card that she put it down for good. Once again, Annalise had turned her into a sobbing mess. She hardly knew what to think. Every part of her was desperate for the words to be true. But less than two hours ago Annalise had admitted their relationship was a complete charade. Why even write such a heartfelt message if that were true? Why not just write Merry Christmas and be done with it. This card with all its false declarations of love was just cruel. In fact, everything Annalise had done, including pretending to be in love with her for weeks, was cruel.

Eve left the card on the bed, unable to look at it again, and headed back downstairs. Her family was still gathered in the living room, now with a spread of hor d'oeuvres on the coffee table.

“Your phone rang,” her mother said as soon as she walked into the room. Eve picked up her cell phone from the coffee table and sat down on the couch. She didn’t recognize the number.

Her dad asked, “Is it Annalise? You should call her back.”

Eve sighed. “It’s not Annalise. She’s not going to call.”

“Then maybe you should call her,” her mom insisted.

“If she wants to talk she can call me. I’m not the one who ran out on her on Christmas Day.”

“Eve’s right,” Jake interjected. “If her girlfriend wanted to be here, she would’ve stayed. We should just leave it alone, enjoy the rest of Christmas.”

Eve looked at her brother, surprised at his rare show of support. She smiled her thanks.

“Besides, I think it’s nice that it’s just family,” Jake said.

Eve’s smile fell. “Annalise is my family.”

“No, she’s your girlfriend. Or at least she was your girlfriend.”

Eve grimaced. She wasn’t ready to talk about the end of her relationship in such certain terms.

Jake continued, “I mean, having your girlfriend walk out on you Christmas Day is pretty much the death knell of any relationship. You had to know it would end like this. It’s just history repeating itself.”

Eve glared at him. Fuck you, she thought. But she wouldn’t say that. Not in front of her niece and nephew. She regretted ever confiding in Jake about the details of her first breakup with Annalise. But Jake was different then, not nearly so bitter. And they were closer.

“Annalise is not the same person she was 20 years ago,” Eve said.

“Really?” Jake asked in mock surprise. “Because this looks pretty familiar.

The sound of her cell phone ringing interrupted Eve’s reply. But she was grateful for it. She didn’t want to continue this conversation with her brother. She was on the verge of breaking her ‘no profanity in front of children’ rule.

Eve glanced at the caller ID. It was the same number as before. Who would be calling her repeatedly on Christmas Day? She put the phone to her ear.

“Is this Ms. Eve Rothlo?” A deep, male voice asked.

“Yes, this is Eve Rothlo.”

“Ma’am, this is the Darien Police Department in Connecticut. We have a vehicle registered in your name that’s been involved in an accident.”

Eve blinked, struggling to understand his words.

“No, that can’t be right.”

“You own a 2015 black Mercedes E350? New York plate number LCA 4681?”

Eve felt her chest tighten.

“Yes,” she said, barely above a whisper.

“Ma’am, I’m afraid your vehicle has been involved in a collision. We’ve had some trouble tracking you down as it’s registered in a different state and we’ve been unable to recover the registration documents from the wreckage.”

Eve winced at the word wreckage. No, this couldn’t be right. Annalise had left over an hour ago. She should be halfway home by now. Maybe the car was stolen. Annalise could have stopped for gas and someone could have stolen the car. She was probably fine, just stranded somewhere. But then, wouldn’t she at least call?

“Was anyone in the car?” As soon as she asked it, Eve knew the question was poorly phrase. But the officer understood what she was asking.

“There was one casualty, non-fatal, the driver of your vehicle who we’ve identified as…” He paused, likely shuffling through documents to find the name. “As a Ms. Annalise Keating. Were you aware Ms. Keating was in possession of the vehicle?”

Eve hunched over on the couch. She couldn’t breathe. She put a hand to her throat but that didn’t help. It felt like she was suffocating.

“Ma’am? Ma’am? Were you aware Ms. Keating was in possession of the vehicle?”

“How-- how bad was it?” Eve asked, her voice shaking. “How badly was she hurt?”

The officer paused for a long moment then said as if reading, “She was extracted from the vehicle and taken to the hospital unconscious with visible injuries to her head. But that was about an hour ago, ma’am.” His voice softened, “I’m sorry, I was only told to track down the registered owner of the vehicle. I’m at the station, not on scene. I could put you in touch with one of the responding officers to get more information.”

“No,” Eve said, more harshly than she intended. “I just need to know what hospital she was taken to.”

Her hand was trembling now and she was having trouble keeping the phone to her ear.

“She was taken to Stamford Medical –“

Eve ended the call and dropped the phone beside her onto the couch. She buried her face in her hands. Her face was covered in tears. She didn’t even know when she began crying. She vaguely registered other voices speaking to her, her parents maybe, but she couldn’t make sense of what they were saying. She had to get to the hospital. But she couldn’t move; she couldn’t feel anything. This was her fault. She’d given Annalise her keys, practically threw them at her, even though she knew how dangerous it was for her to drive in a blizzard. Annalise had been so upset she was irrational. But Eve didn’t have that excuse; she should have tried harder to make her stay. She didn’t know what she would do if Annalise…

“I have to go,” Eve said, pushing herself up from the couch with tremendous effort. She held on to the arm of the couch until she could steady herself.

“What’s going on?” Her father asked.

Eve opened her mouth to respond but no sound came out. Her father rested a hand on her shoulder, waiting patiently.

“Annalise was…Annalise was in an accident,” she stammered.

Her mother gasped. “Is she all right?”

Eve shrugged, her face still wet with tears. “I don’t know. The officer didn’t tell me anything. I have to get to the hospital.”

She quickly glanced around the room, searching, though she couldn’t remember for what. Her keys, maybe? Yes, that’s right. She needed her keys to get to the hospital. But she didn’t have her keys. She’d given them to Annalise.

“I’ll take you,” her father said walking to the coat closet. She followed him.

“No, Dad, it’s still bad out there. This is my problem.”

“You can’t possibly think I’m going to allow my only daughter to drive alone in a snowstorm.”

Eve winced. That’s exactly what she’d allowed Annalise to do. Annalise had begged her to go with her but she’d refused.

Her father pulled on his coat and held out hers. She took it not wanting to waste time arguing with him.

“We’ll be back. You guys stay here,” he said to her mother.

“Be safe,” she heard her mother call out as they headed out the door.

As soon as they stepped outside they were blasted with cold, piercing snow, worse than what it had been during their snowball earlier. But Eve didn’t care how bad it was. She had to get to Annalise.

The roads were packed with snow nearly two feet deep and it had already begun to ice over. Eve sat in the passenger seat of her father’s Hummer, trying to help him spot traffic signs. But she could hardly see through the blanket of whiteness ahead of them. Besides, her mind was elsewhere. All she could think about was Annalise and whether she was all right. This was Annalise’s second brush with death in only a few weeks. First a shooting, now a car crash. Would there ever be a respite from all the suffering?

Eve followed her father’s lead as they parked the Hummer and raced inside the hospital. Her father had donated millions of dollars to the hospital over the years and knew the facility well. Eve was relieved when she finally spotted the front desk of the emergency room. There were several people gathered around but no formal line. Eve pushed passed them, ignoring their grumbles.

"I'm here to see Annalise Keating," she said, panting to catch her breath from the dash into the hospital.

The nurse, an older woman with greying hair and spindly fingers, ignored her and continued tapping away at her keyboard.

"Annalise Keating," Eve repeated louder. "She was brought here after an accident."

"I’m sorry,” the nurse said, still not looking up. “We've had a number of accidents come in today. Look around. I'm slammed right now. Just sign in on our visitors log and we’ll update you when we can.”

Eve glanced around the waiting room, noticing for the first time how full it was. She wondered where all her family's money was going if the emergency room could barely handle an influx of emergencies.

She turned back to the nurse, "Listen, lady, I'm not waiting. I demand to see a doctor. Or at least someone who doesn’t have the people skills of a five-year-old.”

That was enough to finally get the nurse’s attention. She looked up, her eyes wide with surprised offense. Eve felt her father place a calming hand on her shoulder.

"Please, we're not trying to insult you," her father said. Eve disagreed but remained silent. "We just want to know if she’s okay. The police didn't tell us much.”

“Sir, I’d like to help, but there were other people in front of you,” the nurse replied haughtily. “I’m afraid you will just have to wait.”

Eve glared at the woman.

“You’ve got to be —“ she started, but her father interrupted her.

“Fine,” he said, his voice cold and direct. “If you can’t help us then I need to see your chief medical officer or an attending physician. Tell them Jim Rothlo wants to speak with them.”

Eve watched as realization crossed the nurse’s face. It was obvious she’d heard her father’s name before. It was no surprise really. He donated so much money to the hospital they had named a wing after him.

Her father said, “If you do this for us, any favor you name is yours. I can put in a good word with your boss. I’ll be sure to let them know how helpful you were.”

The nurse perked up but still didn’t say yes.

“Please,” Eve begged. “She’s my… fiancée. We had an argument and she left. I just want to know that she’s all right.” Fiancée sounded better than girlfriend, and Eve knew it would have much more emotional sway. She could already see the nurse’s resolve crumbling.

The nurse finally sighed and said, “I guess I can check for you.”

Eve smiled, gently bumping her father as a sign of thanks.

“What was the name again?” The nurse asked.

“Annalise Keating.” Eve spelled it out for her as well.

As the nurse typed on her computer, Eve bit her lip, craning over the desk to see the screen. She couldn’t bear to wait any longer to find out about Annalise.

The nurse stopped typing. Her face scrunched up.

“What is it?” Eve asked, concern in her voice.

The nurse looked up at her briefly. Eve could see she was considering whether to answer. It must be bad news then. Something must have happened on the way to the hospital. Eve was on the verge of falling apart, when the nurse finally said,

“She’s in stable condition in the trauma unit.”

Eve released the breath she’d been holding as a wave of relief washed over her. Her father pulled her in for a hug. Annalise was alive. And if she was in stable condition, she was clearly already on the road to recovery.

Eve turned back to the nurse. “Can I see her?”

The nurse was still reading the computer screen. A strange look lingered on her face.

“What’s wrong?” Eve asked.

“It says she initially refused treatment,” the nurse said. “She also refused our request for an emergency contact. And she refused to have blood drawn.”

Eve and the nurse stared at each other. There was really only one reason someone who’d been in a car accident would refuse to have blood drawn. Eve was sure the nurse knew that.

“Can I just see her for a few minutes?” Eve asked. “I need to see with my own eyes that she’s all right.”

The nurse paused for a long moment. “You promise I won’t get in trouble?” She asked, looking at Eve’s father.

“No trouble,” he reassured her.

The nurse sighed and leaned closer to Eve. “I shouldn’t be doing this, but…I have a cousin just like you.”

The nurse dropped her voice down to a whisper. “She likes women too. Married one even. You know, now that the laws have changed.”

“Oh,” Eve said. If making this woman feel like they had some sort of mutual understanding on all things gay was her ticket to see Annalise, then so be it.

“They’ve been together 20 years. Longer than me and my husband.”

“Good for her.” Eve forced a smile. Coincidentally, that was about how long she and Annalise had been apart. “Do you think I can see my, um, fiancée now?”

The nurse led Eve and her father down a long corridor with white, unadorned walls and squeaky vinyl flooring. Each time they passed a room Eve's heart lifted, hoping it would be Annalise's, but they just kept walking. As they turned a corner, Eve heard a voice behind them call out, "Jim!"

Eve turned to see a man in a white lab coat hurrying towards them. Her father groaned.

"Jim, it's been a while," the man said as he approached. Eve read the name stitched into his coat: Dr. William Tinsley. She was surprised. He had the chiseled look of a model, not the lanky features of a doctor. He looked to be in his mid- to late 40s, a few years older than her and 20 years her father’s junior, with sandy blonde hair.

“Bill, I didn’t think you’d be on duty. You’ve worked here so long I thought they’d at least give you Christmas off,” her father said with a forced smile. It was obvious he didn’t like the guy. Eve wondered why.

“I was off. But with so many accidents they called around to see who could come in. As one of the few bachelors still working in this place, I thought I would take one for the team. Let the family men have their Christmas fun.”

He smiled flashing a set of pearly white teeth.

"When are we hitting the racquetball courts again? It looks like you’re getting a bit soft.” Doctor Tinsley thumped her father on the arm. It was meant to be playful, but it looked like it hurt. He paused as a thought seem to come to him.

"Wait, why are you here? On Christmas, no less."

He glanced at the nurse, then at Eve, before turning back to her father.

"My daughter's…fiancée was admitted here after a car accident. We're here to see her."

"Oh, I see. I'm sorry to hear that." He looked genuinely concerned. "This must be Eve then?"

Eve stepped forward and brusquely shook his hand. She didn't even bother with a, "nice to meet you." He was holding her up with useless small talk. She wanted to move on to find Annalise’s room.

"Who's the patient?" Dr. Tinsley asked the nurse.

"Annalise Keating," Eve answered before the nurse had a chance. If he had some more information or a quicker route to Annalise’s room, she wanted it.

“Oh!” Dr. Tinsley looked surprised. “She’s my patient. I didn’t know you knew her, Jim. We offered to call someone for her, but she refused. It was a battle just to get her to accept treatment.” He smiled. “She’s a real firecracker, that one. Ordered me out the room. I didn’t know she was accepting any visitors.” Dr. Tinsley turned to the nurse. Eve saw the panic in the nurse’s eyes.

“I’m afraid that’s my fault, Bill,” her father interrupted. “I threw my weight around a bit and she yielded to pressure.”

Dr. Tinsley stared at him for a long moment then smiled. “You can be pretty intimidating sometimes. I’ll take you to her. But when we get there we’ll need her permission before we allow you into the room.”

Eve’s father nodded his understanding. But Eve felt her hopes dwindle. Would Annalise even agree to see her? They’d had their worst fight ever and Annalise hadn’t even bothered to call her to tell her about the accident. Eve was unsure how Annalise even felt about her at this point. But even if she didn’t love her in a romantic sense, they were at least still friends, right? Annalise had said she always wanted to remain friends.

The doctor led the way and a few moments later they stopped outside a closed door. Dr. Tinsley told them to wait as he stepped inside. Eve tried to peek through as he opened the door but the nurse was blocking her view. Her father took her hand to still it. She was shaking. She didn’t know if it was more from nervousness or anticipation. Annalise was just behind that door.

The door open and the doctor stepped out. Eve couldn’t tell by his expression what Annalise’s answer had been.

“She’s agreed to see you,” Dr. Tinsley said.

Eve felt her heart jump. Maybe their relationship wasn’t as doomed as she thought.

The doctor continued, “She also gave me permission to update you on her condition. She has a severe concussion, so she’ll likely be in and out of consciousness when she talks with you. She also has a few broken ribs. One of them punctured a lung but it’s a very small wound so we’re waiting to see if it heals on its own. When they brought her in, she’d lost a lot of blood but she absolutely refused a blood test despite my counsel, so we had to give her Type O. Other than that she has a broken arm, a sprained knee and ankle, and a few scrapes and bruises. We have her on morphine for the pain but she should be fine. I would say she was pretty lucky compared to some of what I’ve seen today.”

Eve stared at him. Lucky? The list he just read didn’t sound lucky to her. It sounded like Annalise would be in a lot of pain for a long time. And she’d only just recovered from a gunshot wound.

“Can I go in now,” Eve asked already walking toward the door.

“Yes, of course.” Dr. Tinsley stepped aside then suddenly reached out and caught her arm.

“I should tell you…” he said, looking between her and her father. “The police were here earlier.”

“What?” Eve turned to face him. “When?”

“Less than an hour ago.”

“Did they say why?”

Dr. Tinsley shook his head. “They asked if we had run any blood tests. I told them we hadn’t. They went in to speak with her for a few minutes with a nurse. I was a bit busy at the time. Then they left.”

“Shit,” Eve muttered to herself. She glanced back at her father. She was sure he’d put all the pieces together now. Annalise refusing the blood test. The police showing up at the hospital. But if the officers left without placing her under arrest, there was hope this would all blow over.

“I want a moment alone with her first,” she told her father.

He nodded his understanding

Eve turned the knob and stepped inside, closing the door quietly behind her. Her first glimpse of Annalise nearly made her gasp. It seemed as if every inch of her was covered in bandages: her head, an arm, a leg. Eve could even see the outline of a bandage over her stomach under the sheet that covered her. There were tubes in her arm and her nose. Eve had a flashback to just a few weeks ago when she’d visited Annalise, thinking she was on her death bed, after she was shot. She shook off the memory before it consumed her.

Eve stepped closer, surveying Annalise’s broken body until she caught her eye. Annalise was awake but barely. Her eyelids hung heavily over her dark eyes. Her breathing sounded labored. Eve approached her, hoping her expression did not give away the shock she felt at seeing Annalise in this condition.

Eve sat in a chair beside her bed. She considered leaning in to kiss her but she still didn’t know where their relationship stood. Besides, every part of Annalise looked as if it hurt. Eve was almost afraid to touch her. So she took the closest body part to her, Annalise’s unbroken arm, lifted it to her lips and kissed her palm.

Annalise turned her head to watch her but didn’t pull away. That was a good sign at least.

"We have to stop meeting like this,” Eve said with a sad smile.

She waited for Annalise to respond. A long moment passed before Annalise pulled her hand away and gestured toward a side table. Eve saw a cup of water with a straw inside. She picked it up and put the straw to Annalise’s lips, allowing her to sip for a few seconds before setting it down again.

“How do you feel?” Eve asked, leaning in closer. It was a dumb question, but it was the only one she could think of at the moment.

Annalise took a deep breath, grimacing from the effort.

“I’m sorry,” she said in a strangled voice.

“Hey.” Eve squeezed her hand. “It’s okay.”

They would eventually need to have a discussion but not now, when Annalise was high on morphine and suffering from a severe head injury.

Annalise opened her mouth to speak again, but Eve could see it was a struggle.

“You don’t have to talk if it hurts.”

Annalise took several deep breaths.

“It’s fine,” she said softly. “It only hurts a little.”

Annalise’s eyes traveled over her face. Eve was sure she could see the red puffiness around her eyes from all the crying she’d done earlier.

"You look as tired as I feel," Annalise said.

Eve smiled slightly. "I’m sure I do. I swear Annalise if I have to drive out to one more hospital for you...You scared the shit out of me."

“I’m sorry.”

“What were you thinking? Driving off in a snowstorm? You’re smarter than that. You could’ve killed yourself. And why in God’s name would you refuse treatment?”

Eve hadn’t wanted to argue with Annalise but the words rushed out of her. Now that she knew Annalise as all right, she was suddenly angry.

“I didn’t want them to test my blood.” Annalise answered, weakly.

“Then refuse to have your blood drawn. Don’t refuse treatment altogether. Unless you have a death wish. Are you trying to kill yourself?”

It was a rhetorical question but Annalise answered it, shaking her head slightly. Eve eyed her suspiciously. Why would Annalise feel the need to answer such an obvious question? Of course she hadn’t been trying to kill herself.

“Were you drinking? Is that why you didn’t want a blood test?”

Annalise drew several deep breaths. “I—I took some pain medication.”

“What pain medication?”

“The Vicodin... from the treatment for my gunshot wound.”

Eve stared at her.

“I don’t understand. Have you been in pain this whole time?”

Annalise shook her head.

“But you’ve been taking the pills anyway.”

Annalise looked away and nodded.

“For Christ’s sake Annalise…”

Eve roughly rubbed her eyes. How could she have missed this? How could she not have noticed Annalise had been popping pain pills? She knew why. She’d been too happy to finally have Annalise back that she didn’t want to admit there were any problems. She wanted everything to be perfect so she ignored what was right in front of her. Thinking back on it now, it should have been obvious. Annalise was sleeping all the time. Waking her up was nearly impossible. Eve had thought she was just tired.

“Please, don’t be angry with me,” Annalise said, softly.

“I’m not –“ Eve was about to deny it, but she was angry at Annalise. Not as angry as she was with herself, but she still didn’t want to lie.

“We’ll talk about it later, okay?” Eve soothingly rubbed Annalise’s arm. “Right now, there’s a more pressing issue we need to address. What did the police talk to you about?”

Annalise’s eyes snapped up. “You know about that?”

“Of course. Were you trying to hide it?”

Annalise shot her a look that said the answer should’ve been obvious.

Eve sighed. “I don’t know why you’ll allow me to help everyone around you but won’t accept any help for yourself.”

“You’ve helped me enough.”

Eve doubted that. Was there even such a thing as helping someone you love enough? There, she’d just admitted it. She was still madly in love with this woman. She wanted them to be together. Or at least she wanted to give this relationship more than a three-week trial. It couldn’t begin and end in less time than it takes to process a passport application.

“Well…” Eve nervously pulled her fingers through her hair. “That’s what girlfriends do, right? They help each other.”

Eve waited, looking everywhere in the room except at Annalise. She still wanted this relationship and she’d just let Annalise know that. Now it was Annalise’s turn to make her feelings known.

As the seconds ticked by, Eve could hear her own heart pounding in her ears. The answer must be “no” then. If it was taking Annalise this long to respond, she must be thinking of a nice way to turn her down. Eve began to push back her chair, ready to leave the room, when Annalise said, “Yes, that’s what girlfriends do.”

Annalise said it firmly and confidently. But it had taken her so long to answer, Eve had her doubts. She hung her head, staring at her hands.

“I’m sorry,” Annalise said. “I wasn’t unsure. I just wasn’t expecting you to give me a third chance.”

Eve looked up and gave her a small smile. “You mean second chance.”

“No, my third. But if you want to call it the second, I won’t argue with you.”

Suddenly, Annalise was coughing. It was a dry, hacking couch that lasted for several seconds.

Eve stood up, panicked.

“Are you okay?” She asked, ready to run to get the doctor.

Once her breathing steadied, Annalise waved away her concern.

“I’m fine, just tired,” she said, her voice fading.

“Annalise, wait, don’t go to sleep yet.” Eve cupped her cheeks and turned her face toward her. “I need to know what the police said to you.”

“They asked me for a blood sample, I told them, ‘no.’ What if they charge me?”

Annalise closed her eyes. For a moment, Eve thought she’d fallen asleep but she heard her mumble tiredly, “Eve, I’m scared…”

“Don’t be, Annalise. I’ll take care of it.”

Annalise nodded, then drifted off.

Eve sat back in her chair, watching Annalise sleep. If prosecutors did decide to charge her, it would only be a minor setback. Annalise would have her license suspended for refusal to take a blood test, but there was no way police could conclusively prove DUI without that test. She may even be able to get the refusal charge dismissed by arguing Annalise was in severe pain when she denied the request and wasn’t thinking clearly.

It was strange anyway that the police would suspect Annalise was intoxicated. Why wouldn’t they blame the accident on the terrible weather? Were all the drivers who’d been brought to the emergency room today facing DUI charges as well? Eve doubted it.

The door to the room suddenly opened. Her father stepped in.

“She asleep?” he asked, quietly.

Eve stood up and walked over to him.

“Yeah, she was only awake for a few minutes. I think I’m going to stay here.”

Her father nodded as if he already knew that was what she would do.

“I can drive home and bring back some clothes for you,” he said.

“No, it’s still bad out there. I don’t want you risking your life just to bring me a fresh shirt.”

“I have a Hummer, Eve. It’ll take more than snowstorm to knock that thing off the road.”

Eve argued with her father for a while longer before she finally caved in. He would head home, bring her an overnight bag, and she would stay here with Annalise. Eve didn’t want to leave her side until she was fully healed. She wondered if the hospital would allow her to sleep in Annalise’s room. It was probably against hospital policy. But she thought she could convince them. After all, her father was apparently a reluctant buddy of the doctor’s.

Eve retook her seat beside Annalise’s bed and watched her sleep. She wished she hadn’t chastised her about driving off into a snowstorm. That wasn’t how the conversation was supposed to go. She wanted to reassure her that she loved her and everything would be all right.

The door opened again. Eve was expecting her father, thinking he may have forgotten something. Instead, two uniformed police officers walked in.

“Ma’am.” One of the officers addressed her. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to step out of the room. We need to speak with Ms. Keating.”

“What’s this about?” Eve stood up quickly and approached them.

Neither of them answered her.

“Let me rephrase,” Eve said. “I’m her attorney. You’re not speaking to my client if I’m not present. So you can either tell me what this is about or you can leave.”

The two officers exchanged looks. The older officer, who’d been the only one to speak so far, turned back to her. “I’m Sergeant Walsh. This is Officer Beck.” He pointed to the man beside him. “Your client is being placed under arrest on a charge of operating under the influence of drugs.”

Eve knew the charge was coming as soon the officers had walked through the door. It was the only way to explain their return. But that didn’t make it any less startling to hear. Annalise was being arrested.

Eve turned and saw Annalise was awake. Sergeant Walsh walked passed her towards Annalise’s bed. There was nothing she could do to stop him.

“Ms. Keating, you are being placed under arrest for impaired driving. You will be confined to this room with an officer stationed outside your door until the doctor releases you from care. Then you’ll be booked at the Darien city jail.”

Annalise stared up at him. Eve saw the panic in her eyes.

“Ms. Keating, do you understand?”

Annalise cleared her throat.

“Yes, officer,” she answered, softly.

Sergeant Walsh walked back over to Eve.

“Officer Beck,” he pointed to his silent colleague, “will be outside this door all night. Please ensure your client is aware she is not to leave this room.

“She’s injured, she couldn’t possibly move, even if she wanted to.”

Sergeant Walsh scoffed. “Your client has a reputation for dodging justice. I wouldn’t put it past her.”

Eve wondered at his words. “Is that what this is about? Some kind of law enforcement vendetta against my client?”

“No, this is about justice. Pure and simple.”

Eve glared at him. “I’ve seen this brand of justice before. You won’t get very far with it. I’ll have these charges dismissed by the morning.”

The officer snickered. “I doubt that. The evidence against her is piling up as we speak.”

“What evidence?” Eve was unable to hide her surprise. The cocky son-of-a-bitch was getting under her skin.

He just stood there, smirking at her. Eve knew she would have to goad him into revealing what proof he had.

“All you have is speculation,” Eve challenged. “You’re trying to make a name for yourself by pining trumped-up charges on my client. But don’t worry, I won’t embarrass you too much when I have this case thrown out in the preliminary.”

That wiped the annoying smirk off his face. But now he was looking at her as if he wanted to toss her into a jail cell as well.

He took the bait. “Does your client take Vicodin?”

Apparently, the police knew more than Eve thought. She didn’t have a clue how they would’ve learned that information.

“It’s not illegal to take pain medication and drive,” Eve answered noncommittally.

“It is if it impairs your ability to operate a vehicle,” Sergeant Walsh countered.

“You have no evidence that my client consummed anything.”

Sergeant Walsh narrowed his eyes at her.

“An open bottle of Vicodin was recovered from the front seat of the car,” he said. “And I’m sure blood test results we’ll show she took those pills before driving.”

“Too bad for you my client didn’t take any blood test.”

Sergeant Walsh paused before saying, “We obtained a sample.”

Eve stared at him. He couldn’t possibly be saying what she thought he was.

“You drew blood from client without her consent?”

“She consented when she got behind the wheel of that car. This is an implied consent state.”

Eve nearly stuttered over her words, she was so furious. “My client expressly refused to have her blood drawn. To do so anyway, is a clear violation of her Fourth Amendment rights. When did you take this sample?”

Sergeant Walsh grunted dismissively.“We’re done answering your questions. If you have a problem with our procedures, you can take it up with the district attorney.”

He turned and left the room. Officer Beck followed him out.

Eve turned back to Annalise.

“It’s okay,” she said, walking over and taking her hand. “Their case is flimsy at best.”

Annalise looked up at her with wide, frightened eyes “Eve, after everything that’s happened, even the suspicion of a DUI… it would ruin me.”

“No, it won’t,” Eve said forcefully. “I won’t let that happen. Do you trust me?”

Without hesitation, Annalise nodded.

“I do, but—“

“Then trust me when I say these charges will never go to trial.”

Annalise stared at her a long moment.

“Okay,” she relented. “I trust you.”

“I don’t want you worrying about this,” Eve said. “You focus on getting better.”

“I’m sorry.”

Eve smiled at her reassuringly. “You don’t anything to apologize for.”

Annalise swallowed thickly and said, “It’s just -- sometimes I feel like a burden to you.”

Eve furrowed her brow. “Why?”

“Because I keep bringing you problem after problem. At some point, it’s going to be one problem too many.”

“I doubt that. I like that you come to me for help. I’d be angry if you didn’t.”

“You say that now but –“

“Annalise,” Eve interrupted her. “I like taking caring of you and I think you deserve to be taken care of.”

Annalise huffed dismissively.

“You don’t believe me?” Eve asked.

“What I did was reckless. I put people in danger. That man, the other driver, I could’ve killed him.”

“Oh, Annalise…” Eve squeezed her hand and ran a thumb along the inside of her wrist. “From what the police told me, you were the only one injured in the crash.”

“But what if it had been a minivan full of children? Or a pedestrian?”

“Anyone out for a walk during a snowstorm like that deserves to get hit,” said Eve with a wry smile.

“I’m serious.” Her voice is softer than a whisper and tears forming in the corner of her eyes.

Eve hated to see her in pain but she didn’t know what she could do to help her.

“Annalise, you’re feeling guilty about what happened. That’s the problem with that pesky thing we call a conscience. You need to forgive yourself. It could’ve been a lot worse, but it wasn’t.”

Annalise turned away and didn’t respond.

Eve watched her for a moment. She was facing criminal charges but seemed more worried about the lives she put in danger with her actions. Eve sighed. That’s exactly what good people did: put their concern for others before themselves. She wondered why Annalise didn’t realize that.

“Annalise, I have to ask you something.”

Annalise groaned and turned back to her. “Oh no, it can’t be good if you’re giving me forewarning.”

Eve laughed, grateful for the light-hearted remark among all the gloom and doom. “Oh please, Annalise, the only time I blindside you with questions is when I know you’re going to try to avoid answering them.”

Annalise smiled at her. Eve was sure she didn’t deny it because she knew it was the truth.

"Annalise, I thought you said the police didn’t take a blood sample from you."

Annalise paused, her brow furrowing. "They didn’t…not that I remember.”

"Are you positive?"

Annalise stared at the ceiling, her eyelids began to lower.

“I don’t know, Eve. This is the longest I’ve been awake. My head hurts thinking about it.”

That was the problem. Annalise’s concussion. Eve wondered how often she’d blacked out or been asleep since arriving at the hospital. She hated to push her but she had a suspicion about how police had taken that blood sample and she needed answers.

"Annalise, the nurse and the officers, did you see them leave after they came in?"

Annalise closed her eyes and shook her head. “I don't remember them leaving.”

Her words were becoming slow and slurred.

“I don't know, Eve. I’m tired. No more questions.”

Eve watched her as she drifted off to sleep. She put a hand on Annalise's arm and gently shook her. She didn’t budge. Eve nudged her a bit harder. Still, nothing. Eve wasn’t trying to wake her. She was trying to confirm her suspicion. If Annalise had blacked out or fallen asleep when the police were in the room, as long as they were relatively quiet, it’s possible they could’ve drawn blood from her while she was unconscious. If that was true, she could get the evidence tossed out. All she had to do was find the nurse who’d drawn the sample for the officers.

But there was another problem. The pills that had been found in her car. Even if she was able to get the blood sample thrown out, prosecutors still had enough to charge Annalise. She had to learn more about the details of the accident. All of this had been dumped on her in less than an hour. She needed a game plan. She needed to get ahead of this thing.

Eve left the room, glaring at the officer standing guard, and stepped away to make a phone call.

"Eve?" Her father answered on the second ring.

"Listen, Dad, there's been -- there's a problem here. I need to go to the police station. Can you take me? Are you on your way back yet?"

"I'm pulling up now. What's wrong?"

Eve hurried towards the door to the parking lot.

“I'm going to meet you outside,” Eve said. “Did you bring my laptop?” Eve had forgotten to ask him to grab it; she wanted to get some work done on this case while she was at the hospital. Luckily, her father had the foresight to know she would need it.

Eve briefed her father on what happened as they drove to the police station. She told him about the charges but left out her own knowledge that Annalise had, in fact, taken prescription medication. Instead, she pretended the charges were baseless. It would serve no purpose to implicate her father in this mess and she didn't want to betray Annalise's confidentiality. The situation was already a bit iffy considering they were dating. There were no rules against taking your girlfriend on as a client, but it was frowned upon. Eve figured they would just have to hide their relationship until this was over.

Her father waited in the Hummer as she rushed inside a nearly empty police station. The officer at the front desk was maybe in his early 20s, but looked like he was 12. It was obvious he was working Christmas because he was the newbie on the force. Eve thought she could use that to her advantage.

"I need a copy of the police report from an accident that happened earlier this afternoon."

The officer pulled a sheet of paper from a stack on his desk and handed it to her.

Eve looked at it. It was a records request form.

"I can fill this out but I need the police report immediately."

Eve showed him her attorney's identification.

"Um…" He glanced around his desk. "Everyone in record-keeping is off for the holidays. They won’t be back until tomorrow."

"Listen, Officer…" she prompted.

“Officer Daniels.”

"Officer Daniels. Can you at least check that one was filed? I want to make sure I have the right police station.”

Eve knew she had the correct police station. But she also knew people were more willing to hand over information if it was readily available. Once he got the police report in his hands, it would only be one small step to hand it over to her.

“I guess I can check,” the officer shrugged. “Do you know the incident number?”

“No, but it happened around 3pm this afternoon. It involved two cars, a Mercedes…and a second vehicle. I’m not sure what kind. The driver of one of the vehicles was Annalise Keating.”

Eve waited as the officer sorted through a file cabinet behind him.

“We’ve had a lot of accidents today…” he mumbled to himself.

Finally, he pulled out a folder.

“I think this is it,” he said, reading the documents inside. “Yeah, here it is, Annalise Keating.”

Eve was one step closer to her goal. Now she just had to get him to hand it over. And she needed to do so before any other officers showed up. Technically, she was circumventing all the rules to get this document. She didn’t have the written consent of her client. And the report was not technically a matter of public record yet as the case was still open. But she needed to start picking apart the case before prosecutors started solidly building it. Her aim was to have the charges dropped in the preliminary. She doubted Annalise’s reputation – not to mention her mental fortitude – could endure a trial. Besides, she knew just how often evidence disappeared in the hands of police. She wouldn’t give them a chance to sweep anything under the rug.

"Do you have a copier?" Eve asked.

“Yes, over there.” The officer pointed behind her.

"Then we have everything we need. Why bother waiting for record-keeping?"

"Um.." the officer looked around, possibly searching for some help, but there were no other officers around. "I'm sorry, I don't know if I'm allowed. I don't even know how to work the copier. We’ve had so many calls my lieutenant had to step out to go to an accident scene. I think I should call him.”

Eve placed a hand over his as he started dial.

“Officer Daniels, I can tell that you're new so let me help you. I don't think your lieutenant is going to appreciate you disturbing him for such a routine procedure. You don’t want to seem incapable, do you?”

“No, but I think it would be better if –“

“You don't even have to leave your desk. Hand me the report and I'll take care of it."

The officer stared at her. Eve could see the uncertainty in his eyes. He was afraid to make a move without the permission of a higher-up.

"I promise, I wouldn't do anything to get you in trouble," Eve reassured him. It was a lie. She wanted that police report and didn't really care about the consequences this guy faced. He was young; he'd get over it.

The officer removed his hand from the phone but didn’t hand over the report.

Eve said, "There's really no reason to make this a bigger issue than it is. The last thing I want to do is file a complaint against your department for denying my request for evidence relevant to my client's case. And I know you don't want that either."

"No, I don't..."

“Well, then…” Eve held out her hand.

The officer slowly handed her the folder. Eve nearly snatched it out of his hand and rushed toward to copier. It was only a few pages long. But Eve noticed a memory card was inside as well.

“Are these pictures of the scene?” She called out, turning back to look at Officer Daniels. He nodded.

Eve didn’t ask permission. She pulled her laptop out of her bag and stuffed the memory card inside, copying over everything that was on it. Once she’d finished copies she handed the officer the folder back and thanked him. He grudgingly accepted her gratitude.

“Did you get what you need?” Her father asked as she stepped up into the Hummer.

Eve smiled. “Actually, I got more than I needed”

Eve jumped out of the Hummer as they pulled back up to the hospital. She thanked her father for the help and rushed inside. As she expected Officer Beck was still standing guard outside Annalise’s door. Eve tried to walk into the room but the officer put up a hand to stop her.

“I’m sorry. The patient in this room is in police custody. No visitors.”

Eve stared him. He sure had a short memory.

“I’m her attorney,” she said.

“Can I see your ID?”

“Are you kidding me? I was just in there. You saw me.”

Officer Beck just looked at her, waiting.

“Fine,” Eve relented. “I’m sure you’re superior told you to make this as difficult for me as possible.”

She dug into her purse, pulled out her attorney’s ID and held it up for him. He studied it for much too long before finally moving aside.

“Asshole,” Eve mumbled low enough that he wouldn’t hear it. She really didn’t need any more encounters with the police.

As soon as she stepped into the room, Annalise asked, “Where were you?”

“I’m sorry. You were asleep when I left. I had to run an errand.” Eve held up her overnight bag

Annalise glanced at it. "Are you sure the police are going to let you stay in here?"

Eve scoffed. "I want to see them try to drag me out."

Eve headed to the bathroom inside the room and quickly changed her clothes, throwing on her pajama pants and T-shirt. It was more than she usually wore to sleep but she didn’t want to surprise any nurses. She walked back out and dragged the chairs in the room together creating a makeshift bed.

Once she was satisfied, she looked up. Annalise was exerting tremendous effort to shift in her bed.

"What are you doing?" Eve asked

"Get in." Annalise patted the small open space beside her.

Eve's eyes traveled across her injuries.

"I’m not sure that's safe."

"Get in," she repeated.

"Annalise..."

"You're not going to hurt me. I promise. I’m on morphine. I can barely feel a thing.”

“I’m your attorney, Annalise. I can’t be seen sleeping in bed with you.”

“Well, I can't have you sleeping in chairs. I'm uncomfortable just thinking about it. So either go home or get up here."

Eve released a long, slow breath. Annalise was just as, if not more, stubborn than she was. She wouldn't let this go.

“If we get caught…"  
  
“I guess I’ll just have to hire a new attorney,” Annalise said with a half-smile. “But right now I need you more than I need legal counsel. Please?”  
  
It was the “please” that convinced her. Minutes later, Eve found herself lying beside Annalise, her arm gently draped over Annalise’s bandaged stomach.  
  
“This is reckless.” Eve said.  
  
Annalise smiled. “When has that stopped us before?”  
  
Eve yawned heavily. The day’s events were catching up with her.  
  
“Thank you,” Eve said.  
  
“For what?”  
  
“The Christmas gift.”  
  
Annalise was silent for a long moment.  
  
“You’re welcome.”  
  
“I still have to give you your gift. It’s in my purse…But I’m too tired to get up.”  
  
Annalise chuckled softly. “Don’t. I like you right where you are. Give it to me tomorrow.”  
  
“But tomorrow won’t be Christmas.”  
  
Good.  After today, I hate Christmas," Annalise said with a note of humor

Eve frowned at her words. She took full responsibility for how the day had turned out. It would have been much better if they’d just stayed at home. But she was the one who insisted they visit her parents for their first Christmas together in years. She still didn't know what had driven Annalise away earlier but thought she was likely just overwhelmed. Their rekindled relationship was much too new to include family in the mix.

Eve groaned as she reluctantly rolled out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Annalise asked.

"To change your mind about Christmas."

Eve searched through her purse and pulled out a Christmas card with Annalise's name on it. She carefully climbed back in bed and handed it over.

Annalise eyed it suspiciously.

"I hope this isn't money. My former husband gave me more than enough of that on his dying day."

Eve feigned offense. "When have I ever given you money as a gift?"

"Well, you've never given me just a card before. The only things you could fit in here are gift cards and money."

"Open it," Eve urged with a smile. "And I'll expect an apology once you're done."

Annalise hesitated a moment, before tearing apart the envelope with her good hand. Eve had to help her hold it. Annalise pulled the card out and opened it, but before she could read it, a thick, grey rectangle of paper fell out. Eve watched as Annalise picked it up and read it, her eyes growing wide.

“Is this – this can’t be…” Annalise stumbled over her words.

Eve smiled. "Now you can stop asking me when we're going."

Annalise studied the paper in her hand. Finally, after several heartbeats, she smiled. A huge, ear-to-ear grin. It was so rare to see Annalise smile like that Eve stared at her, savoring the moment. She almost felt like this was her gift as well. Well, technically, it kind of was.

"This is just like you,” Annalise said, still grinning. “I give you a book about Paris and you give me Paris."

“I love the book you gave me.”

Annalise shook her head, chuckling. “How long have you been planning this?”

“Since you first mentioned it in the car.”

“Seriously? That long?” Annalise turned to face her.

Eve shrugged. She’d called a travel agent the day after Annalise brought up their hypothetical Paris trip. She didn’t reserve anything then, just checked on prices and hotels. The final plans weren’t made until they were officially back together.

“You’re sneakier than I thought.” Annalise said.

Eve laughed. “I have to be, especially if I want to get something by you.”

Annalise put aside the plane ticket and picked up the card. Eve watched her nervously. She’d written that card before their argument and hadn’t changed it. It was full of overly sentimental declarations of love.

Once Annalise finished reading it, Eve took it from her and set it on the side table along with the plane ticket. Annalise stared up at the ceiling and was silent for a long moment. Eve thought she may have overdone it.

“Annalise, you don’t have to –“

“Thank you,” Annalise said, her voice cracking. “It’s a wonderful gift.”

Annalise still hadn’t looked at her though. Eve cupped her cheek to turn her head and felt wetness on her hand. She lifted herself up and saw Annalise was crying.

“Oh God, it was too much, wasn’t it?”

“No,” Annalise said. “It was perfect. You’re perfect. It’s just…Eve, I’m in love with you.”

Eve’s heart fluttered at her words.

“Loving me makes you cry? I don’t know how I should feel about that.”

Annalise continued sobbing.

Eve could see she was overwhelmed with emotion. But something had been nagging Eve ever since they’d implicitly agreed to continue the relationship. She hated to push the issue but she needed to know.

“Annalise, if you are in love with me, why did you say you weren’t?”

Annalise groaned. “Please don’t remind me. I didn’t mean any of what I said at your parents’ house. I was upset and I wanted to leave. I knew you wouldn’t let me go unless I said something horrible.”

Eve thought it about it further.

“Why were so upset? I thought we were having a good time.”

“We were, it’s just –“ Annalise sighed. “Can we talk about it later? I’m getting tired.”

“Okay,” Eve relented. “But you can’t say things like that to me, Annalise, even during an argument. If you tell me you don’t love me often enough, I’ll believe you and you’ll have a difficult time trying to convince me otherwise.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Annalise said, wiping tears from her eyes. “I shouldn’t have said what I did. I was just…scared.”

Eve stared down at her, taking in every feature of her face. She was beautiful, even in tears.

“What are you so afraid of?” Eve asked her, gently.

Annalise looked away from her. It was awhile before she answered. “Because if you knew how much I loved you, you’d know how much control you have over me. It scares me, the idea of being at someone’s mercy like that.”

“You let Sam have that kind of control.”

“No,” Annalise said firmly. “I didn't.”

Eve nearly smiled at Annalise’s declaration but suppressed the urge. She wanted to enjoy this moment but she couldn’t be happy when Annalise was so distraught. Eve leaned downed and brushed her lips across Annalise’s cheek before pulling back.

“I have to be honest,” Eve said. “I like the idea of you being wrapped around my finger just as badly as I’m wrapped around yours.”

“You would,” Annalise said dryly but she bumped her playfully.

“Seriously, I just bought you an all-expense paid, two-week vacation to Paris. With, might I add, the view of the Sacré-Cœur I promised.”

Annalise smiled.

“And I scheduled said vacation three months from now. So clearly I want to keep you around at least until then.”

“Three months?” Annalise said with laughter in her voice. “You better be thinking more long-term that.”

“Oh, I am. I just don’t want to scare you away with all of my grand plans.”

Annalise looked up at her smiling. Eve hesitated for just a moment before leaning down and gently pressing their lips together. When she pulled back, Annalise was looking up at her beneath heavy eyelids.

“Get some sleep,” Eve said, kissing her cheek. “I’m surprised you were able to stay awake this long.”

Annalise hummed her agreement.

Eve lay back down beside her, burying her face in Annalise’s neck and holding her hand. She felt the tension in Annalise’s muscles slip away as she fell asleep. It wasn’t long before Eve followed her.


End file.
